


A Couch For A Story

by SheOnceToldMe



Category: SheOnceToldMe
Genre: Action, Angst, Annoying Romance, Chaptered, Drama, Electricity, F/F, Family, Fluff, Gay, Humor, Lesbian, Multiple Timelines, Original Characters - Freeform, Original Story - Freeform, Original Universe, Periods, Smoking, Superhero!AU, Used to be Larry, dance, etnicity, faith - Freeform, power, superhero, uni - Freeform, very cute students, very real problems, wlw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-30
Updated: 2018-04-08
Packaged: 2018-08-27 23:09:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 40,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8420788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheOnceToldMe/pseuds/SheOnceToldMe
Summary: Here's to me, thinking I can write a realistic superhero story.





	1. A Couch For A Story (The Monster) (Prologue)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A talented ballet dancer just wanting a well paid desk job.  
> A controversial graphic designer throwing her future away.  
> An orphaned, angry girl with a lot of power she never asked for.
> 
> Put them together and an explosion of nicknames, arrogance, love, drugs, confusion and well meant college dreams will occur.
> 
> Alternatively, here's to me, thinking I can write a realistic superhero story.

9th of January - now 

White dots drifted by each other. Dust in the static air. As if they were snowflakes. Weightless. Not a care in the world.  
That is what the ray of late sunlight, throwing itself through the singular window revealed.  
It felt a little bit like the exiting feeling you used to get. The almost scary, shaky one. Exploring the old attic of your grandmother’s house. Yet sneaking in on your toes. Ready to sprint. Ready for when they came. If they came. They never did of course. Monsters. That’s what it felt like. Or maybe it was just the old dust bringing back memories. 

Climbing down the last few steps. Wading through that cloud of tiny particles as if they were nothing. She switched on the lights. They came on with a low hum. Like always. There were three flickers of light before, finally, the energy fully connected with the copper thread. She turned right, nearly blindly. Toward the second wall of shelves. The place to be at any given moment of inspiration, or need for it.  
At least that was the plan.  
But as she reached the third isle of the deserted, dusty library, something moved just in the corner of her eye. Or rather, someone. So maybe there really had been monsters after all.

 

It was late. A Thursday afternoon. And Dodie Pointer had never before been not alone around those times of the working days within this place. None of the boys she grouped for projects with would voluntarily drag their asses in here after school schedules. It was more like a storage full of old papers and magazines than a library anyway. Sort of like a dumping place for unwanted literature to put it nicely. So it took her by wild surprise, to say the least, when she noticed a dark silhouette in the corner. Okay, so maybe it was not the monster. More like a person. A person attempting an escape through the high placed window .  
Letting her defensive side take over, the masculine one, was a natural, involuntary even, next step for Dodie. This particular side of her, the big brother she never had so had to be, it sort of came with the job. Dodie wasn’t shy, not at all in fact, but scared that she was quite often. And, taking in account the demographic of the subject she choose to major in, her protective solution of hoisting up what once was learned in old acting classes, could only be seen as a healthy, sadly still useful next step. Dodie, broad shoulders and big, heavy steps, left her yellowed papers and glossies for what they were. Approaching the now stuck but ever struggling mons- human with her head high and mightily clutching the strap of her shoulder bag for support. 

“Who are you? What’d you want?”

Dodie half sneered. Her Voice loud in the tense room. The stranger falling from a misguided grab for the latch and possible scare from the girl speaking. 

“You have no business being here if you don’t hold the option to enter through the door.”

Dodie stepped forward, taking her chance to tower over the intruder.  
It was just a girl. The stranger. Looking up at her with big eyes. Awaiting. Innocent. But not afraid. Dodie didn’t recognize the girl from her year’s students. Neither as any of the girls from any of the other colleges around. Weird. Considering Dodie was known for remembering faces within record timed. She was exceptionally extroverted. And curious. And, just for the record – since it’s a list now anyway - . One of Dodie’s many talents was her insane hunger for gossip and tales. She’d always been the source of ninety percent of the rumours around campus. A rare talent to have, one should know. It was what brought Dodie and her best friend together in the first place. Raaf, her forever favourite person. Even if Dodie was the only one who would remember her name. Anyway. Mystery girl stealing Dodie of her much needed research time. Not needing much practice time – obviously. But she enjoyed perfecting what she did. Keeping busy was a form of art for her – the girl! Right. Not recognizing the gal, Dodie folded her arms and cocked her head to the side. Taking her view in from a different angle. A new perspective if you will. ‘T was in that moment that the dark haired, bird nested haired, plucks of hay like hair fleeing the beanie under the hoodie she wore haired.. that the hairy girl seemed to overcome her shock of being caught. For she had sort of just been sitting there, frozen in her fall for the past twenty seconds. Like a dear in headlights. She quickly gathered herself and crawled back up, all long limbs, backpack defensively clutched against her chest. She was taller than Dodie was, yet her glossy eyes managed to impossibly widen even more. 

“Alright, alright. I come in peace.”

Dodie raised her hands to accompany her words. Trying to calm the girl. 

“Sorry, sorry. I shouldn’t be here. I just assumed this place wouldn’t be.. get used. Now. I mean.”

The intruder spoke, her first words to Dodie. 

“No one does. Just me really.”

The girl really looked out of place Wearing layers of clothing, carrying the mildly stuffed backpack. Her eyes hadn’t decreased in their startled huge-ness in the slightest. It made her appear young. Lost. Small. 

“Ok. Good.”

The girl said. Standing up straight.

“‘Cause I was planning on sniffing around a bit.” 

She looked determined now. Trying her best to suddenly sound tough. Dodie knew which shelf held the hard covers. 

“Really now?”

Dodie stepped closer towards her. Head high. The girl backed up, hitting the wall. 

“Well, I’ll give you credit. No better place to go treasure hunting than right here. Most of the books still have seventy five percent of their pages. If you ignore the dates you could pretend we have complete magazine collections. And if you were planning to spend the night, making yourself comfortable on a chair or under a table.. Let’s say that by the time some twenty-something dude found you in the morning you’d still be better off here then next door where they study politics. Those man can’t be trusted!”

And that right there would be the only time in the history of Dodie Pointer’s wonderful life that she failed to lighten things up with her way of words. Side note: Dodie lies. The only thing her little non advice set in motion were the not monster’s eyes as she, yeah, opened them even more. Dodie grew serious concern over the possibility of them falling out. 

“Don’t sweat it dear, I was only joking. And the view is way better where the art students go anyway, they have mirrored dance rooms and, oh never mind.”

Always so clever. Yet the overdressed darling deer just stared at her bewildered and confused. She seemed naïve. Fine. Chipless, without a scratch. Simply couldn’t be much older than fifteen. – Dodie was very small for her age. – Everything about the lost girl seemed so innocent, everything but her eyes. Dodie’s heart got a little heavier as images of her own little sisters flickered through her mind. Painting this young winter monster in an even more vulnerable light.  
Then again. There were the eleven year old twins, selling secrets for books in her hometown. There was no more room for innocence in this day and age. Those big eyes and flawless features must be deceiving devices. 

“I.. I kind of do need shelter though.”

The ageless girl spoke, rough and honest.

“Do you think I could stay here, just for the night, this once?”

Dodie couldn’t help her maternal impulse any longer. Screw whatever knives there could be hidden underneath the jumper or in that backpack! It was curiosity, winning her over. 

“What would you even need shelter for?’

“’T is cold outside.”

“Clever.. fine, I’ll take it!”

Dodie went to scruff the girl’s curly hair but it made her flinch and jump back. Ducking away from the smaller girl’s hand. 

“Don’t touch me! Please…”

Suddenly loud and clear as Dodie was she exclaimed. And Dodie watched in surprise. Then softer, the wild lady sighed her polite plea. She repeated herself, helpless. 

“I.. was just looking for a place to sleep.”

“Oh, come on.”

Dodie jumped up. The girl startled. Dodie excitedly moved forward to push her into the right direction. Only recoiling just in time, no touching, right. Or her eyes would become moon sized no doubt. 

“Enough repetitive talks. Follow me. A couch for a story.”

With raised hands Dodie walked past and hurried her way up the stairs. Leaving no chance for ‘but’ or ‘wait’ or ‘what’. Trying not to lose the contents of her shoulder bag in her all but sprint up the stairs. At the same time focussing on her feet as to not trip. Through the hall, buttoning her coat. Through the door, glad she wasn’t still in her leotard. And while Dodie searched her satchel for her keys her feet, still underneath her, made an automatic stop next to her bike, by the gate of the college ground. A cigarette already between her lips she lighted it as she fished her keys out of her bag. Curiously looking over her shoulder she unlocked the lock. Click. And there came her lost girl. Looking from side to side as she stumbled out the front door of the building. Upon spotting Dodie she worried her lip. Furrowed her eyebrows. Pulled her third jacket tight around her. And started heading over. Dodie had expected nothing less. This was her game. She knew how to move. 

Still overjoyed with her fresh deal. Her new found adventure. Dodie ran up the last flight of stairs of the complex. Followed directly by a pair of wild, green eyes. Thick, brown, messy hair. And too big, shaking, tinted hands holding onto a rug sack. They made a right. Two lefts. One more left and then they made a halt. 

“The Nest.”

Miss Bright Eyes read off the top of the door. It was written in shitty, black marker. Scribbled, more. 

“Left over from the previous inhabitants, Raaf likes it though, so we roll with it.”

Dodie pushed her dorm door open. 

“You see, Raaf’s an artist.”

“Excuse you?”

Came a third voice from within the room. A low, but gentle voice. A noticeable German accent. Dodie skipped towards the sound that came from their kitchen.

“Brought a lost puppy home Frott, may I keep it?”

“Put a pizza in the oven Swan. I am going out with – I’m going out.”

They clapped each other on the shoulder as a greet or goodbye as they made their way back to the supposed living room section of the place. 

“Don’t burn the house down, thank you very much. I’ll be back by, like, tomorrow.”

“Have fun with absolutely no one in particular!”

Dodie yelled as reply and got a dirty look for it as Raaf grabbed her jacket. With a “See ya, Do.” And a “Bye, puppy.” She was out the door. Effectively shutting ‘puppy’ out for she had been awkwardly waiting, just behind the doorstep during the encounter, not sure if invited. Dodie ran over to her, letting her now red faced new friend in again. 

“I’m not a puppy.”

“Sure you’re not.”

 

“So!”

They were both seated on the couch. Opposite ends. Indian style, both with their legs crossed. Facing each other. A pizza on a cutting board balanced on a cushion in between them. 

“So?”

“So, you got your couch. You owe me a story.”

The girl sighed and looked down. Pulling at the fabric of the sweater she wore underneath the button up underneath the hoodie. She had refused to take any of them off.  
Dodie kept on pleading for her to hold her end of the bargain. Full of hope and expecting to get it. To know her story. Something interesting. A new friend maybe. A good laugh. It didn’t matter. Dodie had to know this new story, a stranger’s story. The great eyed girl let out another deep breath. She kept toying with the sweater until it frayed. A thread came loose..

“So, lately I’ve been trying not to freeze to death so I broke into your college’s study basement place because I was curious and cold and I need somewhere to sleep and here I am an that’s all. End of the story.”

Damnit. Even as fast and unclear as she tried to speak the fact that she averted Dodie’s glare at all costs said enough. Why was she hiding? Why couldn’t she just trust Dodie? It’s not like her story would be dramatically retold or like Dodie could totally expose her. Only a little bit.  
The keeper of secrets stopped pulling at the, by then, fraying wool and grabbed a slice of pizza instead. Looking up at the owner of the couch. 

“By the way, uh.. thank you.”

Sincerely for the first time and looking straight at Dodie. Then she stuffed her mouth with pizza. Effectively ending her ‘story’ and the conversation all at once.

“Wait. No! That’s not fair.”

Dodie folded her arms.

“Come on! Talk.”

The girl shook her head slowly and focussed on swallowing her big bite just to get another slice in. She paused however. Staring at her own hands.

“Please don’t.”

“Hey, it’s not.. you can tell me.”

Dodie pressed. Clenching her jaw while also attempting a soft smile. Maybe banter would work this time. So she tried with a chuckle. 

“You owe me.”

Suddenly the new slice of pizza the girl was holding went black and crumbly. Accompanied by a sizzling sound and a faint swirl of white smoke. The big eyed young woman quickly let go of the smouldering slice. Dropping it back on the board where it crumbled entirely.

“I just… I don’t want to talk! Okay?”

“Okay…”

Dodie watched her cautiously. The room smelled of burnt food. 

“Sorry.”

That was weird. 

And as the girl was nowhere to be found by morning it seemed that she had disappeared from Dodie forever. With everything she held. Like nothing had happened. Like the girl wasn’t real. And Dodie was left with the same old nothing new. How weird it was indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, it's me, back once more.
> 
> And here is what is going to come:  
> More ACFAS, I think uploading a new chapter once a month might be the best option for me.  
> I have a life, I am oh so sorry.  
> Also, a new short story that I will publish as well as post on here. (It's already on my poetry site but I'm rewriting it shh)  
> And CHRISTMAS STORIES! Yes. Like every single year I will attempt to continue the christmas!au I started for Larry.. And, like every single year, I will end up rewriting the first part again. Will we ever see a part 2??
> 
> That is all I know for now.  
> Enjoy the new ACFAS.  
> I hope you're okay with the huge wait between each upload.  
> And please do leave a comment, feedback gives me life.
> 
> Bye


	2. First Day Of Summer / Last Day Of Spring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here's to me, thinking I can write a realistic superhero!au.

21st of July - nine years later

Dodie definitely isn’t jumping up and down. Shut up! It’s just well… in a matter of seconds she will be… in only a few hours.. where does the time go? – She is going to be..  
Spike tucks the flaps of her sleeves in the right direction one last time. Scowling at her for pulling at them. So Dodie picks at her big, beautiful, tulle skirt instead. Spike slaps her. And then it’s time. Her friend leaves her be and Dodie takes a breath. Dodie is gonna marry. There definitely exists no happier thought in the whole entire world. Dodie Pointer will be marrying the most wonderful company she’s had for the past eight years and unstoppably fell in love with. Her father takes her arm and leads her out of the kitchen door before finally letting go and so giving his daughter away.   
Dodie and her soon to be official partner for life had sat down together planning this moment numerous times. Changing everything again and again. Until only weeks from the date. Willing as well as needing it to be something great. And it is. Their wedding. Small and therefore even more like a fairy tale. In their own backyard.   
Just last night she and her girlfriend – her fiancé – her soon to be wife – oh my god! Just last night they had decorated the outside of the back of their house with fairy lights. Jokingly threatening a divorce if the bloody cords wouldn’t untangle. Dodie looks down at her feet as she walks down the path they made. The black and he white rose petals whirl up slightly with every step she takes. The soft flower pieces are scattered from their house all the way to the handmade bows underneath the big tree. Highlighted by a line of tea lights on each side. Lit with great precaution. It isn’t perfect. It can never be. But it doesn’t have to be. The bow will never look the way it is supposed to. The pictures hanging from the braches of the tree remind her of these moments that are missing. Empty chairs emphasise what couldn’t be. But as it is, Dodie knows it is the best they are going to get. And it is good enough. It is more than she would dare to hope for. Their family. Their friends. Their house. Their story. The incredible and perfect beauty of it all. The flowers have barely opened up. The morning dew still glinting on the grass as new mist gets ready to set down in only hours from now. A purple sky. – Yes. Of course they are sealing the deal on the last day of spring! The fresh scent of nature and calm air climbs up, making Dodie feel like she’s a stupid flower herself too. Beige and white. She likes it though. Long, soft leaves weighing down by the water drops .Blue and purple eye liner. Vulnerable but determined. Just like the girl she cares so much for. Dodie might be snappy and sharp around the edges but, if you aren’t convinced there is a certain kind of romance to her, you should be told how completely wrong you are.   
Dodie looks over her shoulder one last time. Catching Spike tip toe through the grass. Filling up the last empty space. And she catches the reflection of the rising sun beginning to hit the silver shards at the foot of the bow in the kitchen window. The light playing with Spikes dark skin. By the time their vows have been said the light will be high enough to completely illuminate the bow. Leaving them as silhouettes. Like a print in time. Until the sun will set tonight and paint them in the sky, with a new picture for the tree, and an evening to celebrate this new chapter as the summer begins.  
But for now, the fairy lights and candles light up everything else with a hazy vibe. The image so mesmerizingly pretty. The twinkle probably matching her slightly watering eyes. Keep your cool, Swan. Dodie tells herself. You’ve already shattered your tough ego too many times today. She turns to watch her step again. Not ready to see that sunlight play with her wonderful love just yet. She eyes their crowd. Their audience. What do you call it? Their attendees. Pointlessly curious Dodie looks around. Hiding the nervous feeling that absolutely is not there. She sees her sisters. She sees the painters in their overalls. Mr. and Mrs. Frott. She spots her fifteen second-years who insisted on choreographing and preforming a celebratory dance for their favourite teacher. This is the point that will mark her third crying session of the day. Goddammit. She sees their neighbours. The major of their town who became a good friend. She sees the mail man they blackmailed into coming over. Her own teachers. And, oh… There, straight ahead of her. Right in front of her. A few steps away. She sees her. Standing there. Dodie briefly forgets how to function. Frozen. Her feet in the grass. Under the tree, surrounded by pictures, memories for a life time. Under the bow. Under all of it. There stands a shy, big eyed, young woman. Her arms behind her back. Tiny silver dots, like sparks, in her unruly hair. Wobbling on her tippy toes, to her heels and back again. Her cheeks slightly rosy. And with her big, green, glassy eyes she stares right back at Dodie. Both dumbfounded by the reality of it all. Confused by their luck. She looks so beautiful. So very magnificent. Dodie fights the urge to start pulling at her own sleeves. Her head full of that mist. Lost. Her senses tingling like lame Christmas lights. And she can’t hold herself any longer. And Bailey knows it. Bailey knows her. Bailey gets it. Dodie isn’t good at waiting. So Bailey opens her arms just as Dodie digs her feet into the earth and fuck it all runs over those last few meters to her. It’s irresistible. Bailey catches her and they both chuckle as Dodie buries her nose in her lovers warm neck. 

“You ready?”

It’s not really a question that Bailey softly whispers as their audience settles down. But Dodie nods anyway. You are beautiful, she thinks. We made it. Look at us. Look at us! Look at us, here. And every one who is here, to see and to care. And we’re still here. Still strong. We made it. You and me. 

They both step back and turn to face the man they hired to legally wed them. He guides them through the vows. All Dodie can do is drift with the waves of everything. Fall into her own stomach… forgetting how to gravitate herself when she thinks of it all. It feels like floating and she looks for Bailey’s eyes. The air cold. A slap of realization to her mind. Everywhere. Bailey’s hand is there. Warm instead. To hold her down. Ground her. And Dodie wants to laugh, because her white shoes are dirty from the ground she ploughed by fidgeting but there is no time. Now is not the time. As Dodie feels feather light between the rose petals and sunlight. Forever not being able to take it all in. Now would be a great time for some nicotine in her lungs, to hold her down. But she made a promise, a reason. And Bailey’s low and rough “I do” pulls her mind back down once more instantly. Ha! She’s not the only one emotionally wrecked. Dodie is momentarily confused as Bailey squeezes her hand before letting it go. But as she watches her quickly wipe a tear off her golden check and notices the silence Dodie clues in. Right. Uhm. 

“I, Dodie Balthazar Prometheus Mo Pointer…”

Bailey chuckles and everything is manageable once more. 

“… am willing and prepared to take Bijalee, better known as Bailey, or for some as puppy, as my wedded, sweet wife.”

Dodie, you got this. 

“Through sickness and health. Through downfall and prosperity.”

Her breath involuntarily hitches. It’s scary. It is final. It’s is so big and great and beautiful and terrifying. 

“Through whatever may come that we haven’t faced yet. Until death do us part.” 

And most likely after. 

She will always be there to take care of that glorious soul. She swears it to herself.  
Dodie is asked for conformance. Right. Uhm. 

“Yes. I mean, no.. I mean, I…”

She doesn’t know why she chokes up. She turns to find her Bailey. Bailey smiles at her. 

“I do.”

She stumbles. Turning back to the dude with the books she repeats. 

“I do.”

And even by the second time she says it, it is barely a whisper. But it is all she has to say. Bailey is bouncing on her feet again. Long by now given up the fight to stand still. Always fidgeting, always moving. If she’s quick she can probably reach for some last part of Dodie for she feels like she’s dissolving into the air herself. Floating away. Overfilled with love. Sinking. Levitating. High on it all. She finds herself right on earth instead. Supressing the heavy need to reach out and touch. Bailey. Kiss Bailey. Just a little longer. And marriage is cruel like that. ‘Cause it is not fair to be denied the touches you need in moments like those. All the fucking formalities. Their son, Preston, nervously steps toward them. Holding up the rings with more care then he’s ever had in his three year old life. They take one another’s hand. There’s an expected, tiny shock. A ‘sorry’ and a comforting smile. And Dodie puts the other ring around Bailey’s ring finger. And then it’s done. Not waiting for those final words to be spoken Dodie surges forward and crashes her lips onto Bailey’s. Their friends cheer. Fireworks go off in Dodie’s head . And her hand grabs as much of Bailey’s hair as she can get. A hold on. And she’s glad they did do the whole civil wedding thing. She thinks of all their troubles. And she remembers. And she thinks of all their laughs. She remembers that first cold day when they met each other for the very first time. How Bailey had made a smart joke upon finding Dodie’s bright pink tutu in her satchel. Allowing Dodie to see past her shell as Bailey learned Dodie was not all harsh and tough. Allowing Dodie to see past the layers to the woman she is now.   
And maybe it was in that moment, back then, that she should’ve known already. Bailey is her anchor. And so much more. People cheer and clap and stand and dance and sing. Candle’s flicker. The lights, the colourful spring morning, the fresh summer day. All Dodie’s nerves on fire. Everything glows and everything is warm as Bailey and Dodie kiss. As they become BaileyandDodie in that kiss. And Dodie is so glad it is Bailey she has lived so many moments with. That it is Bailey that she loves. And Dodie thinks marriage is actually quite wonderful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are,  
> I'm back at it again.   
> There it was. 
> 
> Next time, on A Couch For A Story:   
> (in the present)  
> Dodie will get revenge for her burnt pizza.   
> Bailey will terrify a cashier.


	3. An old promise and a lot of power.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Dodie finally get her story? Two young girls meet in a store. Their worlds collide and everything explodes..

14th of January - now

The next time this were to happen, Dodie swore, she would make Raaf do it herself. This was the third time in like three months she – not Dodie! – broke her phone. Cracked the glass screen, dropped it in the toilet, or like now, managed to get glue into the headphone hole. If not for the fairly niceness of the employees of the technology store in the corner of the centrum of their college town, by the bridge to the flats and campus, all still willing to take her broken phone and fix it for less than a few tens as long as she brought gossip and a smile, Dodie would’ve… “Oops!”  
In her frustration Dodie had lost focus and walked directly into the person in front of her. Stupid. Lost in her thoughts. Like always. But, hey, at least she had found the information desk in her wandering. 

“Oh, uh, pardon. You may go first.”

A low voice suggested. Nervously. The polite and pointless sentence coming from the body Dodie had just crashed into. The voice coughed to clear it’s roughness and carried on before Dodie got a chance to speak her mind. And Dodie loves to speak her mind!

“You seem kind of in a rush. I mean… I’m not trying to- I’m not upset or agitated. I just meant that…”  
Dodie rolled her eyes and was just about to push the rambling female into the cashier, for the queue had already cleared and Dodie decided she didn’t feel like listening without at least one earbud to play music through, loudly, when the young lady turned around. The girl fell silent. Dodie’s brain stopped working and started rebooting simultaneously. They were in a hardware store, Dodie had no choice but to describe things in such a way now. It came with the location. And yes “They. Dodie looked right at her. Dark curls, rosy cheeks, big, green eyes. That was her! Little lost girl. Everything that had happened over, what, like at least already one week ago? It all came floating back. The short but surely bizarre day. How could she forget? Weird little lost girl. Well… large. The strange intruder that ran away. Dodie’s mouth fell open. The air tasted dry. So she quickly shut it again. Filling it up, replacing the taste with words. 

“Hi.”

“Oh, hi!”

Dodie waited patiently.

“Hi, uh, Swan, right?”

“Swan?”

“Sorry, about our previous encounter. That, that day.”

“You mean ‘Sorry about the day you wicked witched my precious pizza. Sorry about the day you called it a night without saying a word. Sorry about that day, you know, when you broke our agreement. Where you left in the early morning without a trace.’?”

Not so tiny, wild gal scratched her eloquent, hairy head awkwardly. Fidgeting. Speechless. The cashier had folded her arms and leaned against the high desk-like counter. Watching on in amusement. 

“You know, besides the fact that you still owe me a story and that I get a heat stroke from just looking at your fashion choices, you never even told me your name.”

Dodie was not really as fed up as she might come off. It was all just incredibly unfair to her. She never got her end of the wonderful deal. She was a curious and quite impatient being. Dodie wasn’t obsessive. Nor demanding. – She hoped. But still. Besides, she knew the girl could bite back when encouraged enough. And yes, she had completely forgotten about the strange guest until now. But that was all on the tall teen to blame. For giving her absolutely nothing. Now here they were again. Dodie had to, really needed, to know more. 

“Bailey. It’s Bailey.”

“Well, Bailey…”

Dodie tested the name. It tasted better than the dry, static air if anything. 

“My name Is Dodie. Dodie Pointer. I shall spare you the middle names ma’am.”

She curtseyed as she introduced herself, making Bailey smile a small smile and her eyes crinkled a little bit . The cashier broke their bubble. 

“Sorry ladies, good afternoon. May I help one of you now?”

“You go first.”

Bailey whom only appeared to have a first name insisted. And just because the cashier had been patient and this conversation, if started, could loop for decades, Dodie took the offer. Going through the well-known routine of phone fixing exchangements. Dodie, however, made sure to keep an eye on the lost girl named Bailey at all times. Once done, she stepped aside but didn’t leave. Bailey was weird and strange. For now. Dodie determined. She had to get her part of the deal. Bailey’s story. And Bailey was free to do as she pleased, of course, so she waited. Pulling at the straps of her dungaree. Blinking as her eyes grew annoyed by the stale air. Watching as the owner of the messiest hair around, struggled as she interacted with the cashier who’s name Dodie hadn’t read. She wasn’t gonna let her disappear again. What if she found shelter somewhere else? Wait. What if she hadn’t found any shelter after that one night? Where did Bailey sleep? Dodie hoped in all honesty that she hadn’t been living on the streets. Yet it would explain all thirty layers of clothing she was still wearing. But no one should live like that! Dodie felt responsible. Somehow. The urge to help weighing down on her. 

“No, really. You don’t have to wait.”

“Too bad for you, but I do.”

Dodie was quick to make work of it. She didn’t like the ache. 

“You still owe me one dammit! And I still have plenty of couch if you are interested.”

Dodie said. The cashier raised her eyebrows. Bailey shook her head then side stepped Dodie’s carefully nonchalant step forward. She couldn’t read Bailey. Was she scared? It was very uncomfortable. And Dodie realized this one sided interaction could come off rather creepy. But Dodie had already gone this far. 

Bailey cleared her throat and turned to face the cashier. Dodie picked up the low humming that began to sound from the back of the store. Bailey continued to fall over half of her words.

“I uh…”

Dodie’s gaze flickered from a now stuttering Bailey to the ever patient cashier. Nicole. She read now she was closer once more. 

“I was wondering, uh please, if you could possibly maybe like kinda provide some information on uh.. yeah. I’d like… please.”  
Seriously!? What was there to purchase in a computer store that could make you go this flustered?  
Maybe Bailey was a geeky gal. Maybe she was like a mega nerd. Dodie once read this article in one of her dad’s subscription magazines – the poser – imagine what it must be like to constantly hunger for knowledge! Oh, I know right!? Anyway. It was about how someone’s husband had five computer screens in his office. And two TV’s! And maybe that’s why young Bailey was roaming the streets. Maybe she got like, really excited by computer screens too. Maybe she got it off from the Windows start up jingle. And the only reason Bailey hadn’t killed her yet was her Apple IPhone in its glory and lack of storage. A long, high beep suddenly, rudely so, interrupted her thoughts as it accompanied the monstrous hum. And out of nowhere a whole lot of other noises joined in. Dodie pressed her ear to her shoulder. Head tilted. One eye closed. Trying to drown out the sound. It didn’t work. All this could never be a good sign! Bailey Spun around and me Dodie’s eyes with her own full on panicked ones. The sound was definitely not just in Dodie’s head. It screeched through the entire store. Dodie looked relieved at Bailey, Bailey looked scared. The noise screeched through the entire store!

“You need to get out of here!”

“Well then so do you!”

The cashier hastily locked her screen, received an actual visible shock in the process and ran off. Leaving the two young ladies It dawned upon Dodie, the danger they were in. Panic came. 

“We need to get out of here!”

“Let’s go!”

Bailey grabbed Dodie firmly, very firmly by her shoulder and all but dragged her out of the store. They ran. T’ was just their luck they found themselves at the information desk which stood in the store. The furthest away from the doors. They ran. Exit in sight. Slaloming vacuum cleaners and plasma tv’s. All sound disappeared. Silence. Only their running feet and terrified breaths. Barely a few feet away from the entrance, covering their ears to block out the now, suddenly deafening, painful high tones beeping. Until everything exploded.  
The weirdest noises erupted everywhere and the entire store blew up behind them. Glass shatters were thrust through the air. Pc’s and other fancy things caught fire. Bailey and Dodie were pushed forward by the blow of it. And all Dodie could think before she slammed into the cold, tiled ground was ‘How the fuck did I end up in a B-movie?’.  
Pieces of metal and what not landed dangerously close to them. Bailey had met with the earth near Dodie and now managed to duck away from a big, sharp piece of glass only just in time.  
Dodie cursed violently. Enraged and shocked. Something landed very loudly and right next to her other side. Dodie whipped her head around to face whatever it was that had nearly killed her. A sharp pain began to creep up in her shoulder. Nothing had hit her, right?  
She watched Bailey crawl up. A big scratch on her cheek from the fall. Right. Get up. Get out of there. She began to push herself up too. Back on her feet. Quiet. It was so abruptly calm and still. As if the director had yelled ‘cut’. As if all life had been sucked out of the scene. As if nothing had ever occurred. But then there was the smouldering mess the destruction had left. 

“You alright?”

Dodie asked. 

“Me? Yeah. I’m fine. You?”  
Bailey asked. 

Dodie balanced herself now she was vertical once more. One of the straps of her dungaree had broken. Nice.  
“What the hell… yes, I’m ok!”

“Good.”

Bailey sighed, catching her breath. Dodie mentally set herself over the emotional hurt of her ripped clothing. Looked at Bailey. And smirked. 

“You’re coming with me. You basically just saved my ass.”

“Doesn’t that make us even though.”

“What? No. Shut up. You owe me. I owe you. You’re coming. End of discussion. This aint a democracy.”

She pulled a spluttering Bailey with her by the strap of her backpack as she caught her mumbeling. 

“It’s a damn dictatorship I’m afraid.”

“I heard that! Can it!”

Dodie wanted to know Bailey. There was something to the girl. She was so frightened and small but could at once be so sure and quick. Dodie’s shoulder throbbed and she glanced over to the ruins and the mess of the post-explosion. 

“We better make a run for it.”

\- 

“An explosion man. How the hell did that even happen? I swear, everywhere you are shit goes weird.”

Dodie said as she came back from a quick smoke through the kitchen.  
Not even sure if Bailey was listening. Not even sure if it mattered. As long as she was on that couch and she had someone to blabber on to.

“Got us pizza again.”

Bailey was perched on the couch. Sitting perfectly polite on the far edge, hands on her lap. Like she didn’t belong. Dodie had forced her to take off at least two layers and cleaned the wound on her cheek. Her backpack rested against her feet. She seemed reluctant and in no way actually thinking about staying. Eventually, she did take off some of the flannel and hoodies and… band t-shirts. Either by Dodie’s persistent pleas or the warmth the nest already provided. And maybe something about daring Bailey to sweat and stink up the place and the terrible consequences of such an improper situation. Whatever. It worked. And Bailey looked a whole lot less estranged in just her hoodie and whatever remnants of a wardrobe she cosplayed underneath it. Now she just sat there. On the couch. Not touching the TV remote Dodie intentionally had tossed at her. Raaf got them a television a few days ago. A hand-me-down from her favourite pub.

“Things aren’t supposed to explode.”

“They aren’t.”

Dodie rolled her shoulder, annoyed, as she put down the pizza, groaning. 

“What’s wrong?”

Bailey questioned genuine, if not around a bite of pizza. Hungry, honest, ha!

“Nothing. I think I fell weird or something. I landed wrong.”

Dodie reached to rub the muscles in her hurting shoulder. Wanting to brush it off. That turned out to be the worst decision available. It left her with a short shout of profanity and a whole lot more pain in her aching shoulder. Dodie jumped. Bailey did as well.

“What’s wrong? Are you alright? Of course not! Should I get your friend? Are you ok? Let me see.”

Dodie turned away from Bailey’s reaching hand. Bailey raised her hands, calmly, taking a step back. It reminded Dodie of the similar movement she had made the day they had met. How ironic. Bailey’s voice trembled as she softly inquired if Dodie was hurting. How bad it was. And yeah, it hurt! Dodie tried not to sneer at her but dammit. This was not the time to talk. She just had to breathe through it a little longer. 

“Please let me see it. This is my fault, let me help.”

“It is not your fault! And it’s starting to fade a bit already. Jeez.”

“It is though.”

Bailey dropped her head. Stray curls springing forward with the movement. 

“What do you mean? How in the hell would you have a thing to do with-“

“Just… let me take a look.”

Dodie sighed. Slowly pulling at the jacket she had on, because her lighter was in one of the pockets. Pulling the fabric so it slid off her shoulder nice and painfully. Her exhausted sigh quickly turned into a gasp as she stared at her shoulder in confusion. Followed by the sound of teeth clashing against each other and a hissing intake of breath now the real hurt of the apparent burn on her shoulder crept up.  
She looked at Bailey. Her big eyes gave nothing but fright. Raising her hands into her beautiful, brown, eastern hair. Gripping at her too long curls in badly masked panic. Her voice shook as she tried to say something.  
Dodie couldn’t help it, she was forced by reckless curiosity and complete loss at the situation to face the burn once more. Only to realize that the wound was not a simple carpet burn or irritation. It wasn’t even a wound that could have come from a collision with the floor or any flying part of the convenience store. It was a clear, third degree burn. Like a print or brand mark. Seared into Dodie’s, so fine, right shoulder. The shape of a hand. And just as easily as the Raaf and Molly thing could Dodie lay the connection between the shape of a big palm on her shoulder to the one in Bailey’s hair. The TV switched on somehow and Bailey near hyper ventilated in an attempt to calm herself. The hand that had pushed Dodie out of the store, just before the explosion. The hand that was trying to hold onto something but didn’t dare touch anything now. Dodie wanted to ask a million questions. She opened her mouth. Closed it again. No idea what to ask. How? She opened and closed it once more as channels began to change back and forth. Bailey looked on the verge of a breakdown and closed her eyes as she breathed loudly. Slowly calming down. Continuing until her eyebrows stopped their furrowing and the TV turned off. She opened her eyes, now less likely to have a panic induced heart attack but more likely to cry until she’d dry out and break her voice. Without a word they both went to the kitchen where the first aid kit still stood from before. After a few tries she dared to open the metal lid and busied herself, fishing for a proper treatment for Dodie’s shoulder. 

“I am so sorry. I didn’t.. I never would. I.”

And a thousand more broken apologies went by Dodie’s head. But Dodie registered a total of none of them. She simply didn’t understand. Couldn’t Comprehend. 

“I don’t understand.”  
“Stop talking.”

“But-“

“I have to take care of that wound. C- cool the burning down and.. and keep it clean.”

Bailey was the first one to regain a grasp on their world. Dodie slowly nodded. She allowed herself to be led by Bailey’s shaking, careful, barely even touching hands. Treating her shoulder. As Dodie tried to calm her own mind. She looked at Bailey. Her watering eyes. The intense concentration that fought the emotions across her face. 

“So… um. Scientifically speaking..”

Dodie tried. 

“I’ll explain it all. I promise. God I am so sorry. I did not mean to hurt you Dodie. I promise. I didn’t mean to do that. You have to believe me. I don’t want to hurt anyone. And I don’t even understand. I don’t!”

Bailey said. Dodie sighed, it should be her losing her mind right now, not the girl who actually did the hurting part. But of course she had to be the wiser one. 

“Hey, hey! It’s ok. Calm down. You’re helping me now, aren’t you?”

“Just don’t freak out, please.”

“Too late sweety.”

“Don’t, just don’t call the police. I’m a freak. I’ll take care of this and then I’ll go. Right away. And I am so sorry. Shit.”

Dodie picked up the tube she had dropped. 

“So this is your getaway plan all over again. Well forget it! Bailey, you’re staying here. You have a lot to explain, ok? And stop saying you’re sorry, I got it! I won’t call the police. And I am offering you a place to sleep and eat here so stop being so damn sorry already.”

“Ok.”

A painful silence fell as Bailey treated Dodie’s shoulder. Nothing made sense to her anymore. The only thing she knew to do was to try to make Bailey feel more at ease before she panicked and ran away again. Or imploded.  
One explosion a day. Thank you very much. 

“You can stay here as long as you want. For as long as you need. I promise.”

It was the truth. The girl probably had nothing. Dodie had a couch. Raaf wouldn’t mind. Dodie hated not understanding. And Bailey looked like she could use some help. The girl did not respond however. So Dodie tried again.

“Hey, Bailey?”

Bailey cut the end of the bandage off. 

“What?”

“Ur a wizard.”

“That is neither true nor funny Dodie.”

Bailey spoke sharply as she grabbed the tape. But a smile grew on her face. Dodie had succeeded. 

“You must be fun at funerals.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Where have I been?  
> I have been an intern writing and making video's for a woman's magazine for the past six months.  
> Which has been awesome. But working six days a week and getting payed far below bare minimum is also kind of tiring.  
> Now that's done. And summer's here. And so is ACFAS.  
> Returning to you, my dear reader, ever end of the month or more often if I feel like it.
> 
> \--  
> Next time on ACFAS: A very sad, Christmas day in the future.


	4. In The Beginning

24th of December - eight years from now

Each step in the gravel crunches loudly, breaking though the silence of the evening.  
Occasionally accompanied by the wind’s whistle. Blowing through and shaking the lone, tall, crispy – fresh, old green branches of pine trees. It creates the kind of silence even the most obnoxious would hesitate to interrupt. It’s quite dark out where they walk and everything appears to be coated in the lightest tint of blue. It’s a fair scene  
There is no graveyard to be visited. Their bodies had been burned and turned into ashes in the moment. And no one had been there. Dodie does the best she can not to step on any last flowers, fighting their way through the rough ground. Sympathy. Her hand searches for Bailey’s cold one. She holds it tight. Snowdrops hold on as tight to their stems. Hiding alongside walls of distant houses. Warm homes or cold sheds. The soft white a great addition to the mixture of blue and browns that paint the normally green place. She misses the calm and safe feeling the place has in spring. When you can see the colours coming back, marching on, ready for victory. Maybe that’s why March is called march.  
Yet the season fits their intention of visit. It should be like this. Maybe. The ring that is now Bailey’s, cold against their fingers, anchors them both down. It’s the thing that seems to make now, now. For everything else has slipped into routine.  
They come to a halt and Dodie looks at Bailey. Not wanting to face what Bailey’s facing. Her dry lips twitch. A barely visible cloud of condense escapes her mouth. Lips form words. Each word hanging in front of them just long enough to wait up for the next one to follow. Slowly becoming a sentence. 

“This is where they died. Dodie. This is where I murdered them.”  
Het choice of words brings a distinctive sting inside of Dodie. Two, beautiful, green yes stare into her own. And Dodie cannot talk. Nothing she could say to change he injustice of what happened. In the light of the street lantern under which they now stand, Dodie catches the reflection in a tear. There is no graveyard to be visited. Nothing that is left. Except the ruins of her childhood home. And thus that is where they stand. Facing what is left after the fire and the storm. Mourning Bailey’s father. Mourning Bailey’s mother. Reminiscing. Dodie can, all too easily, imagine Bailey living on. If her parents had lived. Living on to grow up and go to university if her parent’s had been alive. Finding a good job. Do it all the normal way. Never even meeting Dodie. But the story doesn’t go that way. And today, like each year they visit the place again. Coming back to the town to pay their respects. To deal with it all even more importantly. Today marks the day Bailey opened up to Dodie. And defines the end of her family. Of the Peverell family. Dodie tugs at Bailey’s hand, pulls her closer. She wraps one arm around her back. Fingers gripping her three days greasy hair. Baily holds on tight. Dodie’s fiancé might be tall and lanky and beautifully muscly. But it is in those moments, small and fragile, where Bailey, slumped against Dodie, fingers gripping her jacket, that she’s nothing more than the big eyed teenager she was eight years ago. She tucks Bailey’s head against her shoulder. Turning to look at the ruins. What once was Bailey’s childhood, Bailey’s shelter, her base, a place that held warmth for her and love, the ruins that should’ve held laughter, not screams. Taken away from her. Dodie looks at all that once was Bailey’s home. And Bailey lets herself fall into Dodie’s arms. In every sense of the word. Neither of them say a thing. 

Late December nine years ago. 

Seventeen year old, student to be, Bijalee Peverell is escaping the night. Playing a game on her laptop. Sitting on the windowsill of her new bedroom on the second floor of the new house. Shivering as the open window lets in a cold breeze. The hairs on her bare arm raise as a storm builds up outside. She groans and punches nothingness as her character in the game dies again. At the very same tie the first lightning bolt strikes through the darkness of the night. The sudden flash of light surprises Bijalee, causing her to jump. Just barely catching her laptop as result. Two more strikes cast down outside. Everything as clear as day in the electric light. It doesn’t take long for the thunder to follow. No. In fact the past two followed one another up so damn quickly that in the three seconds it takes for the rumbling thunder of the very first to pass these bolts already charged and erupted. Bijalee gets upon her feet, staring out of her open window. There is no rain just yet as she watches the beautiful display of ink coloured clouds overtaking the night sky. Lightning far off and worryingly near, illuminating her view everywhere then nowhere. Suddenly it’s dark again. But the strong wind noisily assures the storm is not over yet. Another flash. Actually sees it strike. Into a tree barely a hundred meters away. The entire earth seems to shake as low roars deposit the bass-low clap of impact. The thunder right in time with the bolt. Loud, bland and quick. A loud boom as if bombs were exploding all around. A never ending rumble crawls through the atmosphere. The tree catches fire. Bijalee can’t stop watching. Pulled by mere astonishment at what is happening and frozen in fright. The open window lets in the snow. There is no rain. Snow and lighting. Snow and thunder. Melted snow soaks her hair as her laptop drains. Snow and purple skies and lightning that continues to strike the ground. Too close for comfort. Almost like the lightning is searching for something. Bijalee can’t look away. 

A sharp pain shoots through Bijalee’s hand without warning. Falling to the ground of her bedroom floor she yelps. It hurts! More thunder. More lightning. Sounds and dark and light outside as Bijalee climbs back to her feet in between the cardboard boxes. And she can see the change as red and grey smudges penetrate right through her closed eyes. She bends over, tucking her hurting hand between her legs as if crushing it will stop the sudden pain. Then, just as abruptly the pain stops. Leaving her fingers tingling and her head pounding. The storm only getting closer around the house. Bijalee carefully stretches out her arms and opens her eyes. Studying her hands. Scared. She wiggles each finger. Ok, everything works so far. However, as she touches her index finger to her thumb and a blue-ish purple light connection somehow appears threading between both fingers, sharp and wildly vibrating, everything is no longer ok. Bijalee screams. Or, she tries to. For when she opens her mouth an unnaturally long during flash of light brightens everything. Cutting of her childish push of fear she closed her mouth, dumbfounded. This is greeted by a just as long and too loud growl of the clashing clouds above the house. What is happening? Bijalee is shaken to her bones. Yet, something, somehow snaps. Just as quick as the lighting she seems to, subconsciously switch onto autopilot. Survival mode. It’s not safe her anymore. That is all that she knows. Instinct maybe. Maybe she played too many post-apocalyptic games Whatever it is, it makes her pull on another shirt and a sweater and a coat. She grabs the bag that she once packed in homesick anger from underneath her bed. In it whatever she might have collected in that naïve frustration. She makes her way downstairs. Out of the front door. Starting to just sprint across the path, through their garden. Away. Yet she finds herself stuck, suddenly, on the threshold. It all happens too fast. Even through the darkness and the snow the orange glow is flickering brightly. The smell of burning wood catches up with her panicked senses. A massive, gigantic lightning strike collides with a dormer window on the roof as Bijalee turns around to go back in. Flames rise up instantly. The roof of the attic crumbles down with a groan. Even the dammed Christmas tree they bought just yesterday is set on fire from a burning wooden banister that falls down the stairs as Bijalee watches. It all happens too fast. She can see through the open balustrade around the stairs, a mist of colourful light that suddenly no longer is but for a bright orange. Including the room where her parents are still sleeping. 

“Dad!”

“Momma!”

They’re wearing earbuds not to hear the rain against the glass or Bijalee’s wandering around the house whenever she can’t sleep. They must be unaware of the storm. Or have just been scared awake but trapped  
Bijalee’s knees buckle. Her mind blank as the still falling snow as she sinks to the ground. No. She must run in! Save them. She feels herself fall forward in the cold, mushy, stupid snow. The door blows shut behind her, locked. A window somewhere springs from the oxygen searching flames. Bijalee will just wait here for her dad the door open. To pull it open with so much force that the entire thing might come off its hinges. He’s done it before. When Bijalee got an A for her English exam. And she will just wait right here for her mom. Who will probably trip over her and curse at her for crushing the flowerbeds or just plainly being in the way. Then they will help each other up and flee to the car to sleep somewhere. They’ll find a nice hotel and wait ‘till morning to figure it all out. Maybe Bijalee could suggest that this island just wasn’t meant for them. Just subtly imply it. So she waits. And she waits. And slowly exhaustion pulls her into sleep as her parents and her only family burns alive.  
She might as well freeze to death. 

But she doesn’t.  
Because the next morning she wakes up to police sirens and alarm lights the whole thing. Pulling herself up slowly, processing the fact that she’s still alive, she gets out of the snow. Out of her worst night. They will investigate and hey will have questions. Bijalee doesn’t want to answer them. She wants to never talk about it. Not think about it. Not be here. Not be her. Bijalee doesn’t want to be. Ever again. She doesn’t want any of it anymore.  
She’s fast on her cold wet feet. A plan. It being surprisingly simple: Don’t look back and run. Run and do not look behind you. Not even daring a glance. Just running. And pretending she’s not weeping. Only running. Running away. An awful lot and more. Until her feet are burning, all warm and dry once more. Until she has to remind her lungs how to take in the chilly air. Catching her breath. She finds herself in a new place. And decides this is it. The end has ended. This is new and this is nothing. She is nothing. And she lasts one whole week like that. Running. Sleeping on air conditioning systems of supermarkets, which are nice and hot and very stinky. Living off the fifty pounds she found in her back. If she remembers to eat that is. But she spends most of her time running. Avoiding everyone and everything. Avoiding life. Running, sleeping, constantly traveling further, not functioning nor existing beyond that. She doesn’t know where it is she’s going but she keeps going. Everything hurts and her hands hurt. It’s probably the cold but they hurt and she’s got no one to ask what to do. And slowly a new feeling creeps into her soul. Worry. It sets her sprockets in motion, going round and round again. So she sneaks into a public swimming pool at the very first light. And she showers and she thinks. A plan. She needs a plan. And this time she walks. And she looks around. Starving for the sound of a voice for the sight of a smile. For something to occupy her hurting hands and something that proves that she is alive and real. Something louder than it all. Because she can’t go much further anymore. Cold and hopeless and alone. Lost on some cold December street. Somewhere Christmas ends and decorating street light are taken down. And along the lines the years change. On New Year’s eve a drunken man yells at her. 

“What’s your name little bird?”

A light flickers in her heart and she wants to tell him her name. But something catches in her throat. The man shakes his head and walks up to her, unbalanced and swaying his arms. 

“Bailey, my name is Bailey!”

Bailey decides, because it must be easier to pronounce. And because she’s nothing if she doesn’t have a name. The man slurs her name back at her and Bailey is anything but happy to hear him say her name but at least it’s something. Right? Before she knows it the man grabs her arm harshly and tries to kiss her on her mouth. Shocked and unsure of what to do she tries to duck, kick, fight. Not even scared but furious. But he pulls away before she can react. Retreating his hand like he burned it on a kettle. 

“Fucking stupid slut.”

He growls at her as he backs away. 

“Just wanting to wish you a happy new year.”

He slurs. This determines Bailey. She spits at him. 

“I am not a slut. I am Bailey. Fuck off and go kiss someone else you sick bastard.”

Baffled and confused the man stumbles off. Shaken but assured Bailey walks on. The new year has begun and Bailey has a plan. She wants to live. Even if it’s just to make the scumbags roaming the streets pay. Bailey now knows what she did wrong. It’s her hands that must have set the fire, it’s her hands that burned the man. She isn’t cursed she’s dangerous. And Bailey knows that as long as she doesn’t touch anyone she is safe. She starts to travel again. This revelation sets her mind to work however. And she starts to dream about that night in every single time she closes her eyes. Because all her mind seems to be able to do is remind her of that night. And Bailey constantly wakes up from nightmares to realize she’s already awake. That it is her fault. And that she needs help. But she can’t get it. Because, just like the house and the drunken man and the sweet old lady from the bakery two towns ago, everything she touches burns. And her hands are hurting. And she suddenly doesn’t feel like a new person anymore. She feels like dangerous monster without parents and knows she is to blame. 

Then she meets Dodie. Looking for another warm spot to spend the night And it’s a weird encounter. And the first words she’s spoken since new year’s. And it confuses Bailey. Because Dodie is nice to her. And because Dodie doesn’t run away. And because Bailey’s hands do not burn when she hold on to Dodie as they ride her bike. And being inside a house and having actual conversations makes Bailey’s head spin. It makes her feel more alive than anything had yet. And it actually makes her mind shut up long enough for her to feel warm and to believe things can change.  
And Bailey gets a couch.  
And Bailey screws it up.  
It goes wrong again.  
And Bailey has to run again. 

But unlike anything yet it makes her feel a little better. In the end. And it is a memory of something happy. Even though it went wrong. Bailey doesn’t feel like she is doomed. Bailey feels hope. Because if she can touch things without burning them she can do it again. She is sure she can improve. She wants to and she needs to. And because she has no other choice. And she counts up all the coins she has left, because she needs something to protect her hurting hands. Or rather, protect everything they touch. Because the streetlamp she leans against goes out and makes her realize she cannot trust her hands yet. But unlike last time this stranger, this Dodie, gave her actual help. Gave her hope. Bailey runs one last time. And faith would have it that they would run into each other once more. Bailey would no longer have to go through it all alone. 

24th of December eight years from now. 

Bailey sighs and the warmth of her breath against Dodie’s neck makes her shiver. They both have had their fair share of ‘let’s talk about it’. All blame has fallen and has been taken back. Dodie knows Bailey and she knows room is finally coming in her life. Room for acceptance. Dodie has been at her side for so long and stayed through everything that happened, she won’t leave. So to take their focus off of the house Dodie starts a conversation instead. 

“Hey, Bailey?”

She watches as light catches in the remaining glass of the windows. 

“Have you ever thought about getting kids?”

Bailey turns in Dodie’s embrace.

“With you?”

She asks, confused.

“Yeah with me.”

“Well you know how I feel about it..”

“Yes, but, like, maybe...”

Dodie stops herself.

They are both watching the house now and they both are silent for a while . It is oddly comforting. All things considered. 

“Yeah..”  
They both know why the thought of children suddenly seems logical. 

“I would Dot, I would like to.”

“Do you think we can do it?”

“I do love you, you know?”

“I love you too.”

“You know, when you took me in, no, even before that, that you were all I had to hold onto. I trusted you completely. You just have that effect on people I guess. But your light, your spirit.. and I.. I’m just not sure if I ever even thanked you for that. Helping things make sense again. For me.”

Dodie closes her eyes And this time it is Bailey taking her mind off it. Steering her back to the conversation.

“So, how about names?”

“What, now?”

“You asked me to marry you, yes now!”

“Alright.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do not worry!
> 
> My three jobs might be kicking my ass because I made them expect too much of my sorry edit abilities.  
> But I am still here, uploading ACFAS. Hangover from a wedding but uploading I am ;). 
> 
> And I will still be back with a new chapter by the end of this month. 
> 
> \--  
> Next time on ACFAS: We're right back where we left off in chapter 3.  
> Bailey moves in with Dodie and Raaf.


	5. Settle Down (pt. 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I should start a diary, sell it. ‘Dear Snuffkins, today my idiotic friend, the dancing one, brought home a lost puppy. She’d found the dog somewhat earlier this year. Now it has found her again! It bit her yesterday and somehow that made her decide she wanted to take the mammal in. A bit weird, isn’t it? Anyway, prepare for the plot twist. The dog is captain America. And I’m finally being asked if the Dorito can stay.’

15th of January - now

“I should start a diary, sell it. ‘Dear Snuffkins, today my idiotic friend, the dancing one, brought home a lost puppy. She’d found the dog somewhat earlier this year. Now it has found her again! It bit her yesterday and somehow that made her decide she wanted to take the mammal in. A bit weird, isn’t it? Anyway, prepare for the plot twist. The dog is captain America. And I’m finally being asked if the Dorito can stay.’

Dodie glared at Raaf from where she lay. 

“What? Come on, you gotta admit, the adventures you manage to stumble into would excite Tolkien!”

“Captain America is shitty propaganda. He sucks. Bailey is not like that. She doesn’t even look like a dog. If anything she’s shaped… kinda like…“ 

Dodie moved her hands around, trying to visualize what she looked like.

“Shaped like an owl?”

“You gotta be kidding me! Her name is Bailey, she’s definitely a dog. And that is NOT what Captain America is about Dot, how many times – stop laughing!”

Dodie lay face down on their bedroom floor. Legs sprawled and satchel somewhere by the door as if she’d just given up on her way to the bed on which Raaf lay, upside down, toes up. Actually, that is exactly what had happened. Dodie was exhausted from the night before. It had taken a long time but eventually Bailey talked. Dodie had listened to her every word. Attempting to comfort her as she explained. It clearly was the first Bailey faced what had happened to her and it was confusing. She didn’t tell Dodie all of it, and her sentences were jumbled and missed obvious parts of time. But she talked about moving to the island with her parents and about a Christmas tree that she hated and about their first night in the house and about a big storm and then she talked about lightning and about fire. Dodie assumed the house was hit and that her parents died in the fire. Bailey talked about running away and about her hands hurting and having nowhere to go and being scared. Dodie caught an unfinished sentence about a man trying to kiss her and couldn’t imagine how truly scared the young girl must’ve been, roaming the streets on her own. Bailey talked about running and meeting Dodie and how she screwed up and ran again. And Dodie didn’t have the heart to interrupt her to tell her it was ok and that she didn’t do her any harm. Bailey rambled and tried not to cry. Dodie listened with a heavy heart. It was a horrible evening for the both of them and Dodie didn’t pry any further for now. They talked until the evening became a night. Trying both to understand. Around thee in the morning Raaf had found her way home. Upon seeing the two of them on the couch, in the dark, she turned on the light of a small lamp next to the newest asset of the house, their tv, and muttered: 

“Too tired for this but I will complain about it tomorrow, your ass is mine swan.”

And disappeared into her room. 

Not enough hours later alarms yelled for classes to be followed. Dodie’s brain had turned into resembling remains of a soggy newspaper and her body decided now would be a good as tie as any to start hibernation. She could just sleep right there. In between the frays of the old rug that had possibly gone it’s whole life without seeing a vacuum even once. But Dodie wasn’t allowed to fall asleep. Raaf had dragged her to her room as soon as she’d come home and made her explain. Another long talk later and here they were. 

Bailey was still on the couch. Face hidden in the backrest and probably deep asleep. They let her be. Dodie rubbed her bandaged shoulder. Trying to stop the dull ache that was Bailey’s burning handprint. Of course Dodie had her ideas on what it was about Bailey. Her shoulder, the pizza, the store that, to the inhabitants of the town, was an electric default in the power supply. The whole ‘don’t touch me’ thing. But a homeless, orphaned girl with supernatural powers wandering the streets all alone… Dodie hadn’t read all the comics Raaf never could shut up about. To Raaf it all made perfect sense. All the stories included orphaned boys with pretty faces. This one was just about a girl. And luckily she did not seem to be altered in a lab or was suddenly sporting a six pack overnight. Though Bailey was as silent about her parents as she was about her full name. So Dodie hoped no villains murdering her family would come knocking to collect the lost daughter any time soon. This wasn’t a comic or a Hollywood movie though. And Dodie found it difficult to deal with Bailey’s reality. Unprepared. Not one of them capable of understanding. No one telling them what to do. Or how to handle things. The tragic mess that she brought in. But Dodie finally got her story. And Bailey would stay. No question about it. Raaf took a deep breath. 

“Look, Swan. It’s fine. The owl can stay. Of course she can! She needs this. But are you aware of what you are pulling us into? You are basically taking in bad luck personified. We don’t know what’s up with her. Hell, she doesn’t even! She might zap whatever happens to be in front of her. She might never be able to live a normal life again. And you don’t know her! What she’s like. If she’s lazy or annoying or if she puts her dishes away when she’s done…”

“She’s shy. She’s lost.”

“She’s broken Dodie. If you are really going to risk it all you need to be sure of it. Why do you care so much?”

There was a knock on the open bedroom door and Bailey stood there.  
Dodie sat up quickly. Raaf was quicker. 

“Bailey, hi. My name is Raaf. We’ve met. A few times. Never heard you say a word. How about the two of us play human dishwasher and you do just that?”

Before Dodie could object Raaf was pulling Bailey with her, toward the kitchen. Shit. Dodie ran after them. 

“Oi, Swan. I suppose with all those hoodies we might need to have a washing day right now. Could you run a bag downstairs and run it through the machine. Spin around in time with the tumble and you’ll get your stretches done as well Tchaikovsky.”

Dodie didn’t. Obviously.  
She got the bags ready and dropped them at the door. She gave the two girls two minutes before she leaned against the living room wall, eavesdropping. Overhearing their conversation over the running tab and clattering cutlery. Raaf was an ass. Dodie could hear her putdown plates louder than needed. Keeping her voice lower than necessary. And Bailey was shy. Definitely terrified of Raaf. So whatever they said was mostly inaudible to Dodie. She could barely hear a thing. Only parts of sentences. Praying to mother nature Raaf wouldn’t be too forward to their new roommate. Fighting the urge to climb out of the window and onto the balcony for a quick smoke and to hear better. Dodie pressed herself as far into the wall as she could. 

“So Peter Parker, about that spider venom..”

Well there goes nothing. From the stray words picked up here and there Dodie concluded they were talking about Bailey. About whatever it was that had made her so dangerous. And Raaf was prying. Trying to figure out how Bailey worked. Goddammit! She wanted to run into the kitchen, somehow feeling responsible for Bailey. Suddenly one of them shut the tab. Making eavesdropping a whole lot easier. Except, there were no more words to listen too. Dodie looked up curiously, finding Raaf right in front of her. Dodie glared right back, unphased. Dodie felt anger. Raaf raised her eyebrows. The exchange triggered one word to spiral back into Dodie’s head. “Why?” Raaf had asked before they disappeared into the kitchen. 

Raaf was the first one to break their silent fight. With a shrug as she walked off. Bailey cleared her throat. Hands behind her back. Wobbling up and down the heels of her feet a little. Dodie approached her. 

“What did she say?”

“Nothing much.”

“What did she ask?”

“She wanted to know.”

“What?”

“Everything.”

“It’s – it’s ok though, I have to talk about it right? That’s what you said. And she’s right anyway.”

“About what Bailey, damnit.”

Dodie knew Raaf was going to fuck this up. The girl just needed some shelter and a fucking break from life and they could give her that, right? Sit it out until she could walk on her own two feet. Then Bailey would walk away and they would never see her again. End of the story. Well, maybe they could be friends. But that was all for later. Why did Raaf have to push? This wasn’t one of her fantasy worlds. This couldn’t be fixed by shooting at targets and fucking some damsel in distress. If anything the teenager probably needed therapy and a handful of cigarettes they could not afford. Right, Dodie needed a smoke, her temper was out of control, some nicotine always helped her cool off. But still, the girl came her for shelter. Not to be prodded and poked. Raaf has always been so loose with the rules and regulations of living. Not that Dodie was all sharp and narrow. But this wasn’t about the ‘never skip a day of school’. This was about, about more. And Raaf may have just set off the poison already flowing through her veins. Or maybe that was Dodie. Or maybe it was Bailey herself. Since she should be perfectly adequate at making important life choices herself. But, still, none of this should’ve been in the first place. 

During dinner Raaf finally gave in to the abundance of death glares her best friend provided. 

“Bailey and I were merely speculating what would be a prosperous possibility, Swan. As in now and from now on. You know? Burry it all Frozen style. Become the next superman. Keep on living. Fight. And all the other choices in between.”

And Dodie could strangle her. Now and here. Where Bailey sat, awkwardly. The same way Raaf kept objectifying here as a ball to roll across the stage. Or whatever. Dodie could strangle Raaf just to remind her of her idiocy. Bailey chocked on her food as Dodie drove her fork into the table. 

“Raaf.”

Dodie pressed. The calmness in her voice to obviously not calm. Raaf raised her cutlery bearing hands in defence. 

“Bailey, you’re allowed to stay as long as you like. You can just sleep on the couch. And we totally understand that you need some time. And we respect that.”

Her gaze didn’t leave Raaf as she addressed Bailey. 

“And although I’m no good you can always come and talk to me if you feel the need to. Don’t talk to Raaf though! She’s an ass and has trouble keeping her head out of the clouds for ten seconds.”

Raaf kicked her underneath the table. Dodie glared. Raaf drawled a spiteful “Sorry mom.”.

Raaf was right though. It was insane. Dodie was insane. Today was insane. It was hilarious. Dodie began to laugh. Unstoppable. Laughing and spluttering. Trying to explain to their identically confused expressions. Oh look, they bonded over something. Yes, Dodie totally was the overworked mother of their modern family, trying to fix their shit. They all needed sleep. 

-

Dodie opened her eyes, unwillingly. Confused at first. She wiggled her toes against the untouched, icy end of her matrass. Quickly pulling her feet back to where it was warm and comfy and soft. Where the familiar annoyance of the folds in the topper pushed lines into her skin. She blinked, twice. Not gaining any eye sight in the dark. Something had woken her up none the less. Wiggling one arm free from the old blankets to grab her phone, she avoided straining her conscious to guess the time. This, however, resulted in her being welcomed by a blinding light thrown directly into her face as she pushed the home button. That was a mistake she had to stop making every. Single. Time.  
Wide awake, cursing and still unaware of the time Dodie ventured out of bed and dared her feet forwards across the cold floor. Tea. A zombie like urging call drove her, made her tiptoe to the kitchen, trying not to wake Raaf. Screw her phone, Dodie knew exactly what hour it was. Only in the dead of the fresh morning was their student empowered flat this quiet. No light, no sound, a strange but endearing occurrence not many got to experience. Dodie knew the way to the kettle like the back of her own hand. Even though she felt like one would be way more familiar with their own palm. And even though the back of her hand was a mystery without any light to prove it was still there. With the right amount of veins and bones.  
Anyway, in her sleepwalk-journey to the kitchen and the slumber induced irritation of being awake at this ungodly hour, Dodie had completely forgotten they had a guest camping on their couch. Who was now sitting upright and staring right at Dodie. Causing her to almost fucking die of a heart attack right there and then, thank you very much. Dodie stepped back attempting to hide the fact she almost bolted, screaming. Cursing under a lack of breath knowing now she would never sleep again. Ok. Bailey. It was just Bailey. Why was Bailey awake? 

“Why are you awake?”

“Sorry if I scared you.”

“Yeah. Whatever.”

A bit of rustling ensued as Dodie walked past and found herself the biggest mug they owned. The click of the electric kettle as the water boiled. A well-deserved steaming mug in hand Dodie wondered back to a perplexed Bailey as she realised they sort of sparked a conversation neither had the energy nor the interest to continue. Well then. 

“So, why are you awake?”

“Oh, I uhm, had a nightmare.”

“That sucks.”

“Yeah.”

“Ok, goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Dodie.”

That morning Dodie didn’t even really remember her nightly escapades as she nearly tripped over a soup bowl of cold tea and shortly wondered why the fuck that was there. 

-  
One night later Dodie woke up again. Seemingly no indication for it once more. Well then, how very nice. Tea it is. Dodie thought as she forced herself out of bed once more. And once more almost forgetting how her legs worked as she was met with a figure, rigid, sitting upright on her couch. Right. 

“Bailey, what?”

“I’m sorry. I had another nightmare. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

Her accent so perfectly posh like a Brit could apologize only. The kind you only learn in foreign school anymore. Seriously though. One flown in German. One mystery, no history Indian. Yet the born and raised on the island English Asian was the one who never had gotten rid of her generations lasting stupid accent. How rude. Raaf would play her accent up for fun all the time but could fit in flawlessly if she wanted to. Distracted by the kettle’s click Dodie got back to her tea making. Two mugs. Without even asking. Because tea was a good medicine. And Dodie wished to just sleep a night. Envied Raaf’s oblivion. She wished Bailey good luck with sleeping as she handed her a mug. Which sounded a bit stupid. But Dodie had gone three days with barely any sleep so who cared. And, off for a calming night smoke, she went to the balcony.

Two more days went by. The same way. The three of them just living together. The fifth day went different however. Mostly because Dodie came home to a wonderful sight. Raaf and Bailey had finally started to notice each other. Bailey had been avoiding her a bit the last few days. And Raaf wasn’t forcing Bailey into some super suit. They were just sitting by the small coffee table, on the floor. Backs resting against the couch. It was the only table in the house and covered as a dining table as well as doubled for a desk. And the two girls were just talking. Raaf’s newest project scattered out on the table in front of them. Dodie tried to stay as still as possible where she stood in the doorway. Wanted to know what they were doing. She folded her fingers around her set of keys, minimizing it’s jingling. This was good. 

“Well, I study visual arts at Dodie’s neighbouring college. But I want to specialize on development and propaganda. Not that those are exact courses to be taken. They just need to become strong traits of mine. Before I enter my final year. Like, I once studied social studies right? But was stupid enough to drop out after a year and some. So I need to show them what I know and can do, you know? ‘Cause I’ve got it.”

“And you make collages.”

Raaf nodded in answer to Bailey’s statement. 

“On the street. Like you create art but transform it into posters. Usable for street art.”

Raaf laughed at her confusing tone. 

“I choose collages for a reason, puppy. They have always been one of the least popular sides of the visual arts. Thus majorly unexplored. And I love colour based works. I love the ease and controversy of the technique. I want to do something new and I just love how free one can still feel within this format. There is still so much crazy possible. So many borders to exploit.”

“Yeah. So, why don’t you just get a computer like everyone. If it really does make things easier like you said.”

“Oi, ‘easy’ can only be used by the artist themselves. Keep up! With a computer I could work quicker and I could do more with one project, re-use it sort of. If I could get my hands on Photoshop the possibilities would be infinite.”

“So it would actually be harder.”

Bailey stated joyfully and Raaf applauded her as Bailey took a grinning bow. 

Dodie gaped at them. 

“But yeah. I’d love to be able to adjust lightning without taking a picture of the original work or to soften edges without wet and fading paper. Paint and pencil aren’t everything. But affordable is the key here.”

“But, like, honestly. Where do you get your supplies? I mean images. And all that stuff. You’d need so many contrasting themes and covers of subjects. I always wondered where you’d get all the right pictures. Not that… I’m just curious, I wouldn’t know.”

“Hey! Don’t shy away now Puppy. And I’ll tell you my secret. Dodie’s not a dance student. She doesn’t go to Ballet School. She does advertisement and program development things. Like, she makes apps and writes click baits. She just wants to make her parents proud as the pink and peachy prima ballerina they pleaded God for. But she’s into today’s media and quick money.”

Dodie turned red. She didn’t mind Bailey knowing this. She just felt exposes as Raaf spoke about her as some kind of rebel. She really wasn’t. 

“And what this means is that she goes to the building where all the journalism students go to. So they have a basement over flowing with forgotten glossies and misprinted newspapers a.k.a. my goldmine.”

Raaf swallowed her next words. Suddenly. Dodie could tell what she was thinking of. Of how the two of them met. Bailey eyed Raaf confusedly. Sensing the shift in emotions. Raaf brushed her off with a smile. 

“You know, if it wasn’t for Dodie, running into me with a pile of rejected newspapers, I wouldn’t know what… You only see us bicker but if it wasn’t for my Swan I would never be where I am now. I mean.. Two more years and I will get my papers!”

Bailey nodded, understanding that sentiment. Telling Raaf how they seemed to share this. And Dodie’s heart grew warmer as she blinked away a rogue tear, the love she held over those two.  
Raaf, hating ‘moments’ clapped her hands loudly as she threw some papers around the table. 

“So, I have this special skill, you know, Bailey? A bit like you. Nah, I’m just fucking with you. But I am a lucky guesser is what I’m saying and I guess there’s one more thing we both share.”

Bailey watched in anticipation as Raaf searched through the mess she had made. Dodie’s annoying best friend was incredibly –no scarily precise when it came to observing people, or picking up on speech. But only if she wanted to. Raaf, for instance, knew that Dodie was right behind them at this very moment. And she turned it into a show off to her best friend. A kick back at her protective shielding over Bailey. Raaf fished a paintbrush from a plastic bowl of cut-out newspaper one liners. Wiggling her eyebrows at Bailey. 

“I used to paint, occasionally…”

Bailey admitted in a soft yet surprised mumble. 

“I know you did.”

Raaf turned back to her piece and fished a cut out picture of Hilary Clinton out of another bowl with water and yellow ink with the wrong end of her paintbrush. Laying it out to dry. 

“What, you’re not gonna make me paint something right now to prove my artistic interests to you?”

“You wouldn’t fucking ask me to make you a collage on the spot either now, would you, pup?”

Bailey shut her mouth embarrassed at Raaf’s seemingly annoyed reply. 

“See.”

She drawled sweetly as Bailey’s face contorted from embarrassment to surprise to annoyance to a rare but (according to Dodie) special happy. Like a dog who’s told they are a good boy. Which suddenly explained a lot. 

“That’s why we get each other, high five girl.”

Bailey raised her hand as Raaf held hers up. Then stopped, dropping her arm and staring at her fingers. Raaf looked away awkwardly. So much for that flow. 

Dodie entered the room. Interfering. 

“How are you feeling Bailey?”

“Damn, hi to thee too Swan.”

“Shut it, Raaf! I am trying to fix something here.”

“Bailey are you nervous right now? Or embarrassed. Or maybe just uncomfortable?”

She tried as she shushed Raaf’s cursing interjection. Bailey looked at Dodie; not understanding. Dodie tried to read her body language, sternly. 

“Really nervous… right now, sorry.”

That’s what Dodie thought. See, unlike Raaf, probably, Dodie wanted to figure out what really could be going on. So, in her breaks during classes, while giving classes and whenever she could find the time, really, Dodie had been hitting Wikipedia. Reading all kinds of conspiracies on super powers and how they were supposed to work. Each article different in opinion and each stranger than the next. But at least most of them seemed to agree over one thing. Supernatural powers based on earthly physics and or natural elements that took housing in a human body were hugely driven by emotions. Meaning you could affect the power by how you feel. And electricity seemed like a power scientifically stemming from nature based elements, right? 

She explained as much to the girls. 

“And Bailey, that night, you must’ve been really scared right? And with us you’ve been nervous and quite shy. It must be affecting you an how dange- powerful you are. I’m sorry I didn’t want to say it like that.” Dodie hastily continued. “And, look, it also explains my shoulder thing. When you realized what your power was doing to the store. And it only happened because you tried to get me away and safe. It makes sense, right?”

“It does. Of course it does! Why did I not realize that? Bailey, nature based powers seek an alike ground core in whichever body they settle in. Emotion is that of humans.”

“Yes, exactly, that!”

“I guess that would make sense actually.”

Their new friend chimed in carefully. They were getting somewhere. Things were starting to make sense! Raaf and Dodie discussed on an on. Bailey didn’t speak another word the rest of their evening. 

Dodie did not sleep at all that night. Her body clearly on a strike. ‘Cause what would even be the point if she kept waking up, night after night. Exhaustion plagued her during the day. Yet here she lay. Annoyed. Rightfully so. At her body’s clock. Closed her eyes as tight as possible. Throwing the covers up over her head, all the way she crossed her arms on top of her chest like a dead man. As if any of it would help. Growing desperate she lay as still as possible. Mind immediately and mockingly working at full speed. Fuzzy, late night tea’s and confused Bailey’s flashed by. Maybe it was a dream, starting to play, frame by frame, in Dodie’s mind? Was there, finally, the sweet release of sleep?  
Dodie held her breath. Until she had to gasp for air and escape the mess of covers she had trapped herself under. Damnit.  
Then a sound caught her attention. It sounded like a plea or whine. Just for a second. Gone again. It sounded like a distressed baby cat. Dodie pushed herself up on her elbows, straining to hear it again. Another quiet cry. She sat up. Locating the sound. It had to be near. Climbing out of bed, Dodie quietly shuffled across the room on her bare feet. The living room. She heard a broken voice whisper “No.” Definitely the living room. Definitely Bailey. Definitely a nightmare. Dodie opened the door all the way, could now hear her thrashing around under the fleece blanket they had found her from under Raaf’s mattress. As Bailey whined, helplessly against her nightmare, Dodie felt her heart ache. Where you allowed to wake someone from a nightmare? Well it didn’t matter. Because Dodie didn’t like listening to Bailey’s sad cries. Padding over to the couch hastily Dodie watched over Bailey’s twitching form. Her face showing utter despair. A light sweat across her brow. Reacting, quickly Dodie grabbed Bailey’s wrists, the first one, closest to where she stood. Trying to grab her other wrist just as Bailey started to flail and trash in defence against her night demons. 

“No, no… no.”

“Bailey..”

Dodie went for the gentle approach, careful. Tightening her grip. Calling out her name again a little louder but still getting no reaction. Shaking the fists she held. 

“Bailey, Bailey wake up. It’s just a night- stop trashing around – damn – Bailey you need to wake – watch it!”

Dodie nearly took a hit by a sudden jerk of Bailey’s elbow as she began fighting Dodie’s grip subconsciously. Dodie could actually feel the electricity radiating off of Bailey’s skin. Dodie was no scientist, had no idea how it all worked. But it was like that time Dodie’s grandmother told her to try and hold to fridge magnets together. That was how Bailey’s skin felt against Dodie’s own. Attempting to push Dodie away in her sleep. Her powers surprisingly strong. But Dodie was a dancer. She pushed back and shook her a little harder. 

“Bailey.”

“No!”

Bailey jerked and her eyes shot open at once, she gasped for air. Dodie did not let go. Not even when her hands started hurting. Nor when Bailey’s wrists felt warmer and warmer. 

“Calm down. Bailey. You gotta calm down. Ssh. Listen. It’s just a night terror. Alright?”

She tried to catch the young girl’s gaze, gain her attention. Tried to get through to the horrified teenager.

“I need you to look at me Bailey – ah! Fuck.”

Dodie was now forced to let go of Bailey’s red arms. But as soon as she did she took her by her shoulders instead, which were clad by her now slightly soaked ‘The Velvet Underground’ t—shirt, which was cooler. Dodie shook her, shushing her. Trying to snap her out of it. Finally, her big, green eyes focused on Dodie’s for a second. Dodie took her second. 

“Hey, hey. Calm down. Breathe. Right. Good. It was just a nightmare. You’re ok. It was just a nightmare.”

“But it wasn’t.”

Dodie muttered back. Out of breath. 

“Hey, come on now. Slow, deep breaths. Come, sit with me. I’m here now. Tell me what you keep on dreaming about.”

“About – about them. They were on fire. The house was burning. Everything was too bright. And I can’t do anything. But I should’ve. But I can’t. And they burned. And now they’re gone. And I don’t want to, Dodie. I don’t want to.”

Then Bailey finally broke. Her voice broke. And Dodie’s heart broke. And the damns holding Bailey’s eyes free of tears broke. And she started crying. Letting it all out. And Dodie carefully took her in her arms. Pulling her tighter into a hug as she rested her back against the armrest. She shushed her, the way she used to do when her sisters were still toddlers. And she held her as tight as she dared. Bailey sobbed into her chest. Her hands grabbing at Dodie’s top. Wanting to hold onto Dodie. To feel that safety but, not daring. 

Dodie looked up from Bailey’s curls, could see Raaf in the doorway. Where she peeked in, wary of sleep. Her face told Dodie she was awake enough however. As she shot a look of concern towards her. 

Dodie hummed comfortingly to Bailey and nodded towards Raaf. Rubbing Bailey’s back. Bailey pulled away. 

“I can’t do it Dodie. Seriously. I don’t want to.”

“I know. I know.”

Dodie brushed through her hair, - a first – making her look at her once more. 

“Hey, how about we put the TV on and go comfy on this couch together. The night’s nearly gone now. And I can stay with you, keep you company. And we’ll just let it all flow and go. Yeah? You’ve barely gotten time to deal with it ll. And you’re with us now. And we need a good night and some actual sleep, you know?”

Bailey winked and helped her up. 

“We’ll help you find yourself back once we get out rest. All that yin yang crap. Ok? Come on.”

The three of them went to bed. Neither mentioned anything about it the next morning. Thankfully, Bailey slept better after that. And, just like that, the rest of the week passed by. Until the late night tea’s came back once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still here, yay!
> 
> Still late as ever but also very much still updating each and every month. 
> 
> \--
> 
> Next time on ACFAS: All nightmares aside, there is a party to plan. Someone has a birthday!


	6. Settle Down (The Surprise)

02nd of February - now

“And so the dog, the scarecrow and the tin man made their way upward. Following the path the yellow tiled hallway led. Leading the trio toward a, for them, unknown destination.”

“Really, Raaf. Really?”

Ignoring Dodie, Raaf began climbing the stairs, continuing her – whatever is was she was doing. 

“The magical stairs brought them higher and higher, most definitely not paralleling the successes being made in their business. Selling questionable greens that were – quit the laughing Toto!”

“Seriously? We’re the rogue group. Selling ganja to get to the top… of the stairs?”

The remark came from Bailey this time. Who was struggling to get her words out through bursts of laughter. Today was a great day. Today was super. Bailey had been with them for almost a month. And every day got better and better. She still had nightmares, whether she admitted them by day or not. Dodie knew they still played with her fears at night. And Dodie had climbed out of her own bed to make the two of them tea, every single time. They would talk for a little while In the dark, with hushed voices. Huddled together, side to side, all not to wake Raaf. Sometimes they would talk about Bailey. Most of the times they talked about the very promising future Dodie had as a ballerina, according to her parents and teachers. They would talk about how Dodie would rather teach, like she did now. Working at the village next to this one. How she would love to open young ones up to the freedom that was dance.

“So, you actually are a ballerina then?”

“No. I do modern dance. I just pretend to be a ballerina so that I can study something easy and secure. Excuse my ease and all, but I am all for this desk job that I understand and that will make me wealthy enough to live and dance and teach as much as I please.”

“Oh, wow.”

“What, like you never thought about your future plans, ever. Tell me, what’s something you want?”

“Those pointer shoes you hide under your bed.”

Dodie gasped, faking hurt and masking her surprise. 

“How’d you even…?”

“You tried to hide them from me the first day we met, saw them in your satchel Dot.”

“Oh! Mock all you want.”

Throughout the days both Dodie and Raaf were mostly preoccupied with classes and jobs. But this, as it turns out, has actually been really good on Bailey. For it had given her a lot of time to just be. Which she needed. She really did. And Dodie just spend the time watching her slowly grow bigger every day. Fitting her skin as she became acquainted with the routines of the nest. Beginning to gain more colour as she felt more and more at ease with Dodie and Raaf. Safe. Watching Bailey regain her body. On the days Raaf was home she and Bailey would spent their time together. Raaf wanting to talk about superpowers. Bailey about art. And against all Dodie feared, the two of them seemed to actually get along. Friends even. Dodie hoped that they would and that it would last. Because Dodie loved Raaf to bits. And it was on days like these, filled with laughter, that Dodie was reminded there was so much more to Bailey. Laughing without shame. Her unbelievable quick wit. But something had infested her personality. Something to keep her away from pain in the cold reality she had been pushed into. Yeah, it was in moments like these that Bailey allowed them to see past this thick protective shell. And Raaf fuelled her on. 

“But..!”

Raaf continued her passionate narration loudly. 

“Their business was one of a dangerous kind. And although aware, none of them could have suspected the unfortunate turn of events at the tail. Their best friend, found by the main villain, would be taken away. Their… -“

“Oh my god, Raaf!”

“No, no wait. One of them has to die yet. Wait, let me –.”

“’What, why so cruel, my goodness!”

Raaf tried to look at Dodie, turning around on the stairs, misstepping and almost falling down. 

“Just shut up and watch where you are going before you are the one to die and ruin her birthday.”

Dodie exclaimed.  
Bailey smirked, trying to keep her amusement at the two to herself.   
Today had been a great day. 

Last night Dodie had woken up again. And as if it had become a regular aspect of her life had she climbed out of bed to get tea. Grabbing her jacket and pack of cigarettes she walked past the couch to check on Bailey. Except this time Bailey was still deep asleep. Confused at first Dodie made to move on to the kitchen where she dropped her jacket for now. Had she been woken up by some sound outside instead? But just as she flicked the switch of the kettle on, could a sniffle be heard from the couch. She tiptoed towards the sound. Asleep and still but Bailey seemed to be sobbing… It was soft and sad. With frequent hitched breaths. One or two tears rolling down her cold face. Dodie could easily grab her wrists this time. Her arms lax. Dodie held onto her tighter. Wondering what this change meant. There was no struggle, no electricity coursing through her skin. Bailey had been extraordinarily tired all day. Dodie had only caught Bailey in the midst of a nightmare once before. But that night had been a heavy one. And Dodie remembered how hard it had been to wake her up. Flailing, trashing, her skin burning. The only distress right now seemed to be the occasional tremor of her body. And Dodie wondered if she was supposed to let her be. But tears kept falling down. Her lips trembling and her brows furrowed. That was the thing. Dodie did not know which was worse. The lack of any visible danger as her powers seemed dormant for some reason, yet her broken soul exposed. Or the blunt possibility of getting punched in the face as Bailey fought her past demons. Dodie sighed as she kneeled down beside the girl. Squeezing the hand she held lightly. 

“Bailey…?”

The young girl was deep asleep. Dodie traced her cheek with her hand. Wiping away some of the salty teardrops. She wondered what Bailey could be dreaming about. How bad her memories could be. Then something weird happened. Bailey began to glow. Like she actually, visibly glowed. The water in the kettle bubbled and cooked noisily. Bailey shone a blue-ish shine. And Dodie sprung back in shock. What the fuck? Her whole body started radiating with the colour. As if she was over-charged or something. Dodie didn’t dare touch her or even come close now. She didn’t understand what was happening. Was this bad? Raaf never talked about a superhero who did this. Nor had she ever read anything about it herself. This was a new path. And no one had ever walked it. If we’re going with the metaphor anyway. No one had set up the ‘this way, that way’ signs yet No one had tested if the bridge would hold. Not in their world anyway. And honestly, she was starting to really freak out. And just as Dodie was about to run to Raaf, Bailey woke up with a gasp. Nightmare gone and glow disappearing like it never had been there. Bailey looked confused and scared at her surroundings. Briefly startled, breath to quick, before she brought her hands up to her face. Wiping her tears and snot and hiding away. So instead, Dodie took a step forwards again. The kettle clicked, satisfied with its job, as steam filled the kitchen ceiling. 

“Bailey, can I touch you?”

Bailey blinked, confused at her as she tried to slow down her breathing. She did not answer. Dodie did so anyway. Placing her hand carefully on the dark skin of her lower arm. Testing. Running her thumb against her wrist in a (hopefully) comforting manner. Then taking hold of her hand and lifting it up. Twisting and turning it. Looking to find an explanation. Or a … well she didn’t know. 

“Dodie.”

Dodie let go and faced Bailey who’s big eyes stared at her.   
“Dude, you had a nightmare, but you just started… glowing. Like, all blue. I thought you were going to explode.”

“Oh.”

“Oh?”

“It’s… that’s ok I don’t think I will explode I mean. ‘Cause it has happened once before. Back in December. 

“Oh..!”

“Sorry, uhm. I was on the street and I was tired and really cold and bleeding and I, I just honestly believed I was going to die. But ehm, my hands, they, they started glowing. And they were warm. And I was warm. And I fell asleep I guess? I thought I was seeing things. But apparently it’s a real thing. So, uh…”

“Apparently!”

“Sorry!” 

Bailey bit back just as frustrated, rubbing her eyes with the palms of her hands. She shivered. Dodie sighed and stood up once more. 

“Ok It’s fine. Whatever I guess. Just another thing to figure out.”

Bailey groaned Sitting up but dropping her head in her hands. They both were irritably exhausted from a growing number of too short nights again. Bailey the one having to deal with the actual nightmares. Yet Dodie too was feeling stretched. For she had five full days of classes and work behind her. It took a toll on the both of them. Dodie ran out for a quick and early, however extremely needed cigarette. Bailey took over the tea making part of their little routine. Only a few minutes later they sat on the couch, warm cups in hand. A far off spring slowly warming up the air. They talked. Dodie attempting to talk about Bailey again. Bailey didn’t. Obviously. Dodie made the attempt never the less. Knowingly making her uncomfortable by the prying but “Bailey we might be able to help you better if we know more. Maybe it will help if you talked about all that happened.”

“Well I don’t want to talk about any of what happened ever again!”

Bailey scoffed bitterly and harshly direct. Dodie had never heard her talk like that before. So aggressively dismissive. So done and so bruised. No apology or retreat to follow it up. Bailey shut her eyes. Breathing deeply through her nose. Trying not to cry. 

“And it wasn’t about that night anyway.”

“Then what did you dream about?”

Dodie lowered her tea. Trying hard to keep her own emotions at bay. She stared at Bailey patiently, receiving an angry glare. 

“Stop asking.”

Bailey gritted through her teeth. Her shaking hands deceiving her. 

“It’s my problem, not yours. It’s my hurt, not yours. My guilt. My fault, Dodie! Not yours. Stop asking. Stop caring. Please! There is no point. You’re only making it worse. You don’t have to handle my shit. I won’t stay here forever anyway! Please.”

Bailey looked up and away. Blinking furiously. Dodie focussed on her tea. Was that really what she wanted? To leave again, after all this? 

“What the fuck Bailey.” 

Dodie said. 

“Don’t be like that. We let you in. You can’t just leave. I said I wanted to get to know you. And I still do. And Raaf loves you. And before you say anything – it’s not just because of what or who you are. It’s because she finally met someone to share her ridiculous interests with. I mean, I don’t. And I don’t have to tell you her girlfriend doesn’t. And it’s because you paint. Even when you don’t. Molly doesn’t even care about that. You’re Raaf’s friend. And I care, no matter what. I always have done so. I need you here to laugh at my stupid jokes. And I need you here because you make Raaf talk. We are used to you being here now, ok? But you need to give us the same trust in return.”

Dodie shifted closer to her as Bailey scoffed and quickly wiped at her eyes. Still not looking in her direction. Dodie grabbed her hand. It was tense and larger than her own. Small shocks prickled where their fingers touched. Dodie wasn’t good with people when it came to emotions. But she’d spend a lot of nights with Bailey . She understood her body language. She had spent enough evenings waiting for her nightmares to come. Thinking their conversations through twice and backwards. And she and Raaf had shared enough coffee brakes and smokes those past weeks to understand. 

Bailey looked at her hand that was holding Dodie’s. 

“I know that Dot. I do. I didn’t mean what I said.” 

“I did.”

Dodie replied simply. Bailey sighed. Dodie continued. 

“You are not dangerous, Bailey. Just out of control. And that is changeable. We’ll figure it out. I said we could. And please do stay. I think this is the first time in years that I’ve seen the colour our kitchen counter has. Or that our lightbulbs all work. If anything, you’re handy! You belong in the nest now. You and me and Raaf. It works. And we like it this way. And I might be a bit of a mum sometimes but if Raaf can deal with that you can too. I started this, wanting to help, so I will not stop and we’ll figure you out. And even if we’ve figured it all out one day, even when we’re past this chapter, I honestly do think I’d still want you near.”

Dodie talked without thinking, wanting to ramble on until Bailey understood who she was, how she worked. Bailey smiled shyly a the floor. Wiggling with her toes where the moonlight illuminated them. Then she flew at Dodie, pulling her in a tight embrace.

“Sorry.”

“Stop goddamn apologizing, you are not doing anything wrong. We, as woman should grow above that!”

Dodie hugged her back, laughing and squeezing her as tight as she could. Rolling circles into her back with her thumb. They never really had a reason to hug before now. They never felt close enough, even after swimming pools of tea. And in the moments Bailey had wanted to hug Dodie she had always stopped herself. Not trusting her own body. So, now that Bailey gave in, Dodie took the chance with open arms, literally. She wasn’t much of a hugger, but savoured the moments where she was. 

“You’re like a puppy, for real. I wanna take care of you like the momma bear I am.”

Dodie chuckled at her own delirious confession. Bailey instead, pulled up again. Looking down at her friend. 

“What?”

“What?”

“What!?”

“Well, I mean, I’ve been telling you, it’s kind of like, I just feel like you’re my little sister now.”

“No, but, how old do you think I am?”

“Oh, eh, like fifteen, maybe?”

“I’m eighteen! Wow. In fact, if it’s past midnight I’m nineteen now Dot.”

“What.”

“Yeah.”

“No! What?”

“What?”

“You’ve turned nineteen and you didn’t even tell us? That ‘what’. I thought we were considering each other as good fiends now girl. We need to have a party! It’s your bloody birthday.”

“No, oh, you don’t-“

Bailey pulled the overly excited, yet dumbfounded girl back down on the couch. Mumbling protests about how she was in no mood for such commotion. And how she did not even want to celebrate this birthday. But Dodie just pushed her back. Telling her to shut up and that that was not how things went with Raaf and Dodie. They kept on arguing, playfully. Accusing each other of the miss of this new information. Until the clock struck two. And Dodie gave Bailey a speech about the importance of sleep, like the parent she was. And off to Raaf she went. Waking her up. Forcing her to plan a birthday party for their grown puppy right the fuck now. 

And so it went. 

The moment the sun was high enough in the sky Bailey woke up to confetti and breakfast in bed, or, on the couch. The other two girls deeply asleep, their heads in their arms, splayed out across their coffee table. Scissors and handmade decorations hanging of it. It was a striking view. A very special feeling bubbled up. To Bailey this was the conformation to what Dodie had been telling her all night. Her two best friends right here with her. Quietly climbing over their sleeping forms, Bailey snuck into the bedroom to steal Raaf’s polaroid camera. The first picture of many more to come. The first of a wonderful collection that would tell the story of the most important year of Bailey’s life. 

That day, songs were sung. Messes were made. Decorations improvised. Too many candles lit. And one or two lightbulbs ironically broken. But, in Bailey’s defence, this was the first time she’d had free access to this much wine. And nobody had realized how much fun it was to give a slightly intoxicated Bailey a lightbulb as the afternoon sun left their window. For the bulbs lit up an burned right through in just a few seconds. A great party trick, that it was. And it is! 

Raaf pushed the latch of the building’s roof open and up. Done with her ridiculous storytelling, ready to surprise their new friend. All three girls climbed onto the roof.

“Happy Birthday Bailey.”

Dodie and Raaf exclaimed as they watched Bailey look around in awe. Eyes bright and huge. Her jaw dropping. It wasn’t much, they only had like wo hours to set up everything but her smile was genuine. 

“Wow.”

Raaf chuckled. They had spread out a dozen of candles across the roof’s floor. Lanterns and battery-lit-lights. An old radio sat in a corner, proudly upon a small stack of booze. Dodie had the cigarettes, Raaf the three plastic cups and other necessities. 

“Yeah. Happy birthday, pup. Welcome to the Emerald Roof”

“Thanks, I couldn’t… thank you!”

Bailey stepped towards the edge of the roof, looking out over the other buildings and the street below. It dawned upon Dodie that, even though Dodie had been living here for years, Bailey probably knew the streets better than she ever had. After moving in Bailey had not set a foot outside. Hadn’t left their fourth floor until now. But Bailey had seen more than enough of the outside for years to come. Survival. The slowly sinking sun etched lines in the nineteen year old’s face. 

“Bailey, did you know, back then, that we have a…”

It sounded so stupid, almost patronizing, in a way, but she continued, had to know. 

“We have a homeless shelter in the city neighbouring this one?”

Bailey shook her head as she sat down, legs hanging over the edge. Dangling freely to the rhythm of some song. It made Dodie wonder. How many people there were out there, without a warm place to stay. Unaware. But wouldn’t they learn from the more experienced? Wouldn’t they ask around for a local shelter or soup kitchen? Were they even allowed access? How many of them wouldn’t even realize there was a place to ask about in the first place? Who told them what to do? Why didn’t they group together? So many people, roaming the streets, so many of them taken by loneliness, driven to insanity. The world was difficult. Confusing. But Bailey was here. They were celebrating her birthday. And Dodie decided to just stop thinking about it. Time to get drunk. Or so they decided. Bailey, slowly sobering up again, kept on declining drinks and cigarettes. They respected that. Tipsy wine was good enough this afternoon. So Raaf and Dodie drank instead. Dodie lit a cigarette. Raaf relit the candles. Bailey politely declined. And Dodie pushed a little bit. They changed the radio channels from song to song to song. Sat on the gravel and dirt and watched the night sky where the sun was long gone. And Bailey finally gave in after two curious hits of Raaf’s hazy joint. Dodie couldn’t stop smiling as she watched Bailey. It was her official first time getting hammered. But Dodie promised to watch out for her. And she did. And she also drank along.   
They danced to stupid songs until all of the colour had left the skies. They laughed at Raaf’s stories under the black of the night. And they sat in the comfort and silence of each other’s warmth as the stars began to dance. It was a great day indeed. And they did some more of that roof sitting for a while. Close to the edge. Feet hanging over the end. Complete silence as the batteries of the radio died. Just toes wiggling in the dark air and not being able to see the ground from all the way up here anymore. Just the tender wind and happy sighs. The only warmth the candles Raaf now moved, relit and rearranged around them, close enough to feel the warmth of its halo. Not at an entirely safe distance but good enough for what she managed to place around the three of them. As they sat, practically on top each other. It seemed perfect, Dodie thought. And then Bailey spoke. Her speech slurred, slow. 

“You know what I dreamt last night?”

Silence harsher than it was before.

“I dreamt I had said yes. And I dreamt that I saved a lot of people. And then I dreamt of people dying. And Raaf is right. I have this… This thing, growing inside of me. And I need to learn how to use it. How to control it. Because until then I am a walking jeopardy. I mean, I still am, if I have it under control. But at least then I can turn it into something good, right?”

“Bailey, no, you really don’t-“

“No, I actually have to. It’s clear to me now.”

“You drank too much Bailey. Let’s just… Let’s go to bed, yeah? We can talk about this again tomorrow.”

Dodie threw Raaf, who hadn’t said a word yet, a sharp look. She quickly crawled up as well, collecting their stuff. Then lending an arm to help Dodie support the weight of their already snoozing, still talking friend. 

“No, no, she’s right. And I think I want to, now, I think I do.”

“Sure Bailey, let’s just sleep on it for a night, ok?”

Dodie cursed all the stars they had admired all night. Drunk Bailey was too honest. They worked their way back to the stairs while Bailey rambled on.

“And, listen, since Stan Lee didn’t give me instant abs or natural courage, I gotta-“

“You are not obliged to do anything at all!”

“You’re thinking of Lee Cain, mate.”

Dodie coughed awkwardly at Raaf’s comment, Raaf bit back. 

“Smoking is bad for you.” 

“You’re as much a stoner as I am a smoker Raaf.”

The three different mind sets made it back to their dorm. 

“The nest.”

Read the now only half awake Bailey who suddenly felt quite guilty for smoking with Raaf. 

“Yup. The nest. Come on.”

Dodie encouraged. And. “No, no, no you are sleeping in my bed tonight. You just had your birthday. You deserve a good night’s rest. Let that be my birthday present to you.”

Raaf kind of deserved a good sleep to however so to make sure they’d all sleep comfortably and sound it was decided Dodie would stay in her own bed and Bailey would simply join her. Maybe there was more alcohol in her system than Dodie thought but two quite tipsy and mildly drunk minds found this the best solution of the night. And why not, right? 

“Come on big girl. Follow me. This way. Tomorrow you can face your very first real hangover.”

“Nice.”

And so they went to bed. The three of them in the two bed bedroom. Bailey facing Dodie with only half open eyes as Dodie whispered her a “Happy birthday and good night.” Bailey whispered something that might have been a ‘thank you’ back then she fell asleep.   
Dodie had one arm around Bailey’s waist. And she stared through the darkness to where Raaf lay. There was just enough moonlight to see her. And she stared at her best friend as she thought about Bailey. Sound asleep against her chest. And how she would try to stay at her side. And how much she cared about the girl. And her thoughts wondered off to how Bailey had clearly felt so triggered for the past hour or so. But how alcohol must have numbed her powers for Dodie had felt absolutely none of it while guiding her to their dorm. She thought about the stupid plans the nineteen year old hade made. All the pointless and hopeful dreams. And Raaf whispered an apology to Dodie as if she knew this exact thing was keeping her awake. But Dodie shook her head. Too late. 

“We’ll figure it out, we have to now, and we promised.”

She spoke to no one in particular. Raaf knew Dodie wasn’t really upset with her. Because they both knew Bailey would drift to this mindset one way or another. One day. She already had the poison in her. And Dodie knew she could count on Raaf no matter what. So she smiled at her best friend, nodded as they whispered each other “good night”. 

Every single night after that one Dodie made Bailey sleep in her bed. And since they all greatly benefited from this move, not one of them ever mentioned it. And it was good that way. The three of them. On to the new chapter of figuring this all out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok ok ok ok ok ok, my next five months of interning have begun and I caught three winterbugs and my biological clock is so messed up from saturday's night shift that I kind of zoned right through the last four days.  
> BUT  
> I'm still here, still queer, still very much ok, all that jazz.   
> And so is this story!
> 
> \---
> 
> Next time on ACFAS: Bailey puts her words into action while Dodie pretends she’s fine with that. (- same girl!)


	7. Settle Down (pt. 2)

18th of March - now

Slowly, Dodie woke up. Blinking her eyes against the sunless, early morning. It refused to give her any visuals just yet. She licked her lips. Yawning. It took her a moment to become aware of her surroundings. She was in her bed. In her room. Snores from Raaf quite audible in the quiet. And she could feel Bailey twitching right next to her. Somehow she sort of ended up with her arms around her throughout the night, but it’s not like she can control what her sleeping self does anyway. Bailey’s last nightmare had been over a week ago. And they had had an even longer break before that one. Bailey had been having them less and less frequently. And whether that came from having the safety of company through the night, the time healing wounds or Bailey getting over it all – who knew. But they all got full nights of sleep from it. It worked this way. And the couch had become, once more, just a couch. The story was still here though. Right besides Dodie. Enveloping still. Which Dodie counted as a massive win. In all honesty, it felt like Bailey belonged. No, she just did! Weird as the way they got this new friend was, Bailey started to fit in and positively added to Raaf and Dodie’s lives more and more as time passed. They lived by each other but never past each other. Filling up the gaps. Since Bailey had moved in there had been someone home more often, so the place stayed cleaner. And they finally could set up a proper cooking schedule now that there were three of them to split the days between. There would be someone Raaf could distract herself with when she came back from spending nights out with her girlfriend, Molly. Talking about art instead of avoiding Dodie’s questions and wrongly placed banter. There would be someone who remembered to wash Dodie’s dance outfits and charge her laptop whenever she forgot again. Tiny things that Dodie didn’t even notice at first. Nothing changed yet everything worked. It worked.  
To be fair, it had taken them a while before they trusted Bailey with gas and pans. But, the more comfortable she grew, the fewer her outbursts were. They had moved on from the hazards when touching her. And the TV had been officially re-plugged in two days ago. As long as she had felt like the guest without room for one, she had been on edge. But now, two months and a few fights between Bailey and Dodie’s stubbornness later, all that had started to seep away. Bailey was more mature than Dodie had given her credit for, she began to find where she could add to their lives and did so quite well. Along with this passing and changing of time Bailey would talk more and tell Dodie things. Giving them tiny strips of already torn paper out of her metaphorical diary. She gave them random facts. Told Dodie small things about her past. Trying to let them in. Even though it clearly still was hard for her to do so. Bailey had started telling Dodie happy little things. Little lights that kept Bailey’s mind from drowning. Making Dodie feel like, despite the countless shared bad nights, she did good by taking her in. Like they were going somewhere. Bailey began to share tiny joyful moments. Just because she could. And Raaf drew attention to these things, noticing how she opened up. Dodie reminded Raaf to tread carefully. Raaf reminded Dodie to encourage and to laugh along as she lightened up. It wasn’t often, at first, but they were there and the story that was Bailey grew with each thing she shared. Like how Bailey’s childhood bedroom walls were painted in the brightest colours. How Bailey had this love for sunflowers that she blamed on Vincent van Gogh. And if Dodie brought home sunflowers as well as Raaf’s emergency roses for Molly then Bailey wouldn’t have to know it was because of Raaf’s text message. Bailey was allergic to cats. Bailey loved to wear big rings and pretend they made her, somehow, superior. The bolder or funnier they were, the better. And if Raaf came home with another ring she ‘happened to just stumble across’ in some antique shop, Bailey would take their lies with a blushing smile. Bailey started trusting them. And they were thankful for every bit that she would show. Dodie understood that she had to try and be patient, which was very hard by the way. But she understood there was still so much bad Bailey had to face. Bailey had told Dodie about most of the days and accidents between the big, terrible night and the one in the store. She had experienced the strangest things. Things that scared her, things that made her see why she stayed so far away from everyone, why she hid for those days. There were stories about dead animals who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. And a lot of unfortunate street lanterns and automatic doors after that.  
This is what Dodie knew in short:  
Bailey had migrated with her parents after her grandma’s death. They had been here for only one or two months but had been planning the move for years. As soon as the summer would come her parents would begin a new clothing business on the island, already having bought buildings for the stores. Bailey, who had whined about the cold and unpleasant neighbourhood she had to suddenly deal with, had put off applying for any colleges. She pretended to have a bad case of teenage hormones and locked herself in her room with video games she never truly found all that interesting. It wasn’t until Christmas warmed their new house that she had felt at home once more. It was their first Christmas. And it felt nice, looking for a tree with her dad. Decorating it with her mom. This new feeling lasted to that night as the storm came and brought a fire that destroyed their new house.

The whereabouts of Bailey’s parents were something Bailey never could talk about. Dodie often found herself filling in these holes. Wondering what happened that night. There was more to the fire, that was clear, but Dodie wasn’t sure if she did even want to know. Fearing the worst for the girl and the powers that had suddenly awoken within her.  
Bailey, who hated the cold and loved painting everything in bright colours again and again. Bailey who even tried suggesting to change the nest up a bit if they let them. Bailey who had roamed the city with a bag of clothes and money, angering cashiers who accused her of pranking them with shock rings and stupid questions. Killing stray dogs and cats who tried to nudge a pet or belly rub by warming up against her bare hands. There were days where Bailey would withdraw in the forest and hoped she wouldn’t have to wake up to the smell of burning leaves, to a squirrel trying to attack her and accidently shocking it in fright. There were days where Bailey wished she would not have to wake up at all. Those few weeks alone must have been a living hell for her. But now, all those months later, Bailey was doing so well. This was Bailey who wouldn’t mind sowing the strings back on Dodie’s pointers. Telling her about how, when she was younger, she used to sow the most colourful dresses from patches of old clothing with her mother. And if talking about her mother made her teary eyed no one minded that. Bailey told Dodie how she learned English from this teacher back in her homeland who had meant so much to her when she was in her teens. And Bailey wanted to be like her teacher, wanted to be as nice as she was and as patient as she could be. As clever and as brave as her memory of her English teacher whose name she couldn’t even remember. And Dodie felt prouder than ever as she welcomed her little dancers to class that day.  
Bailey finally considered herself ‘not all that, like, seriously dangerous anymore’. Which she wasn’t! Bailey finally started to live again. And that, Dodie found, was what made Bailey even more interesting.  
Dodie was not a hugger however, so she pulled her arms away from Bailey’s sleeping form. Watching Bailey’s broad shoulders rise and fall with each breath she drew. Bailey had cut off her long and messy curls, favouring a short bop as she joked about starting anew, knowingly never getting all the knots out of there and began braiding Raaf’s short hair in two pig tail braids instead. Raaf only lost 1/5th of her gorgeous locks. And slowly, with a lot of work and careful threading and Raaf’s hair growing out again and Dodie figuring how to cover the burn mark on her shoulder with makeup Bailey gained the slightest bit of control over the electricity coursing through her veins. Trusting her own body once more in every sense of the word. Even joining Raaf and Dodie in their ‘no work no bra’ movement. ‘Cause, let’s be honest, there is nothing more freeing and more like ‘coming home’ then being able to get rid of your bra at the end of the day. And this was her home too. Dodie searched her brain, her still sleepy brain, there was something that nagged her about today. Bailey flinched slightly as nightmares plagued her mind. Dodie needed to know if today was the day… yup. No school, no work today, for any of them. Oh my god!! Yes. – Bailey had gotten a job. Bailey had made the goddamn step. She had tried to casually bring the idea up over breakfast but Dodie not being a morning person almost chocked on her precious tea. High fiving Raaf between coughs. Bailey had wondered past a small building after one of her grocery trips to the supermarket and spotted the little pamphlet in their window. She had found a job as a painter. Not like a painter like artistic stuff. Not like paintings like van Gogh or what Raaf did. Just, like, painting. You know, walls, ceilings, picket fences. And all of them in plain white most often. That stuff. She seemed to be doing alright as well. She had this great colleague who would teach her how to work the job. And, or so Dodie heard from her stories, they seemed to get along really well. She started to blossom with all these new things and distractions. Bailey seemed to become so confident. Believing she could do it. And so, she could. Or, maybe, so far, she could. There hadn’t been any problems yet At work. And they could keep going like this. Their lives in the nest.  
If that.  
Of course the easy life was not going to happen for Bailey. Ever. Dodie focused her attention on the young adult sleeping next to her. Electricity sparkling out below her eyelashes in tiny glitter like highlights on her cheeks. Dodie instinctively moved back a bit as Bailey’s energy defending her from whatever dark memory she was reliving in her mind crawled upwards in her skin. It was almost like a dance. The way this worked. Dodie knew that Bailey’s skin would never charge high enough to actually hurt her in her sleep, every now and then she would wake up with her hair all messed up from the static or get a little shock as she pulled off her covers but never more than that. The nightmares would always wake Dodie long before anything could really happen. And even now she would probably not even be able to feel these tiny sparks. But Dodie was no electrician and it looked kind of scary to her. So she gave the girl some space and herself some comfortable distance. And she waited for the right moment to move again. Listened to Bailey’s breaths like the beats of a song. Not moving in too fast and scaring the girl not holding off too long and letting her slip into a night terror. And it never seemed to get any easier, waking her new friend from a nightmare. But she seemed to get a feeling for Bailey’s timing. For the way her body would move. Dodie had taught her youngest class some techniques on dancing with a partner for their upcoming spring ball. An important and very fun lesson. As the young teenagers would blushingly pair up with one another. Letting them lead each other in turns and helping them understand the way the steps worked. The couple who would manage to avoid stepping on each other’s feet would get to choose their next work out song together. But this was not a dance between partners. And Dodie much rather danced front line of a group performance anyway. Or, alone. But that wasn’t the point. And no matter how Dodie would like it to be, this was not a dance. This was life. This wasn’t something Dodie could feel out first, no solutions that would come as easy as a next step in a choreography. So Dodie slowly raised her hand and touched Bailey’s arm lightly, with the very tip of her finger. It seemed fine. Bailey did not seem fine. Everything sometimes seemed to build up only to just tumble down again. To have the air sucked out in a cold slap and start all over again. No matter how much Bailey would progress. It wouldn’t matter how high up she dared to lift her head. She would still have to carry all this weight and it would always be there. All this crap. And Dodie wasn’t allowed to help. Was not told anything, was not let in. Could not carry any of it for her. Only half a story. Only half a Bailey. And Dodie whispered her name. No response, except for the shortened and panicked breaths. Dodie dared to grab her wrists. She held them still and pushed them against Bailey’s heaving chest, shaking her slightly. Dodie called her name. A little harsher. A little clearer. Trying not to be louder but persisted still. Bailey woke up. Big eyes blinking furiously. Arms tensing Forgetting to breath entirely as she fought to hold back tears. Her green eyes focusing on Dodie’s through the dark. Dodie leaned in closer. Still not letting go of Bailey’s tingling wrists. Allowing Bailey to see her and to pull herself out of the nightmare. Trusting Dodie. Trusting her enough. Bailey tried to even out her breathing has she anchored herself. Dodie looked right back at her. Waiting for the confusion and shock to leave her eyes.  
Then she pulled her friend up into a sitting position. Both now resting against the wall the bed stood against. Side to side, somehow now holding hands. Still catching their breaths. 

“Everything alright, Swan?”

Raaf croaked from across their tiny room. Waking up anyway. Dodie tried. 

“You ok?”

Dodie asked Bailey instead of answering Raaf. Bailey nodded quietly. And Dodie let go of her hands as she passed the nod onto her best friend who had grabbed her phone to check the time. Dodie moved her hands through her hair. Letting some fresh air through as she scratched her warm neck. Bailey began to bite at her nails. Pulling her legs up to her chest. 

“It’s five past seven girls.”

Raaf announced around a loud yawn. And she swung her legs out of her bed. No point in going back to sleep. Dodie groaned. 

“Where does the day go!”

\---

The sun was steadily rising behind the skyline up ahead. Buildings partly blocking out it’s rays. Partly, but for blinding flashes of bright orange and bright yellow, steadily masking all that was in silhouettes. Partly and so creating strange shapes across the ground. The shadows were long and grotesque. Yet also soft and significantly framing the spring’s early morning. The sky was cotton clouded. The sun like sharp white daggers. And honey coloured beginnings. The grass underneath their feet a brownish green. Scattered patches of mint green as well as hay and strays of moorland. The loose pieces of wired fence the three friends had climbed through collided with their metal poles every so often. A lazy symphony by a warm wind. The outgrown grass was dry. The hay was dry. Their feet were dry. The air was dry. Dodie looked around, taking in the field that surrounded them. The random piles of bricks and scrap metal and nomadic soda cans. 

Bailey had kept the drunken promised she had made on her makeshift birthday. Against all Dodie’s hoping that she had forgotten, had she kept it, still stood by it. Every single morning had she trained. Push ups. Sit ups. The whole works. Dodie even caught her doing squats once. Whatever they would be good for in her plan to fight evil.  
When Bailey proved herself just as determined and set, still wanting to make this all ‘right’ one week later, Dodie finally gave in to Raaf’s pleading. Raaf had wanted to take Bailey out. To properly test and figure out her powers and how to wheel them. She let them do it. She just didn’t want anything to do with it. Didn’t like it at all. Never liked the superhero stories and their terribly lame and cliché plots and stupid deaths. They bored her. And although they all kept to their agreement of Dodie not having to deal with their self-enabled adventures, had she been dragged called in to deal with the consequences of their so called ‘training sessions’ quite a number of times. To put it bluntly, Dodie became exceptionally well at treating burns and other casual wounds that came with the experiments. And she kept an emergency bottle of water on her bike at all times.  
Dodie had promised to tag along today. And although she already heavily regretted it, she kept her word. Drunk or not, Dodie had thought about it and tried to understand it. It wasn’t a normal thing but if Bailey really thought it was good to train, Dodie thought she should give her the chance to try. Raaf led them to an open field. Something that once must’ve been a building plan for new parking spaces and hundreds-of-people-at-the-same-time-flats or something. It was just an abandoned grassy field. Hooray for the shitty employment system of this economy. Too bad if you’re part of the fucked over result of baby boomers ruling the world. Not that they could ever afford living here or anywhere anyway. Not with college bills and minimum wage still being a thing. It truly was one or the other. But yeah, here they were. Raaf and Bailey took their, for them, familiar places and Dodie stood uncomfortably at Bailey’s side. Nervously awaiting what they would do.  
Their practice started out pretty mundane. A lot of Bailey closing her eyes and flexing her hands, trying to create a reaction. To draw out the energy that ran through her veins. It was a bit awkward to watch. But they’d been doing this every week for this long and it showed. Bailey definitely had progressed. Because, eventually, tiny purple and blue lights started to thread between her fingertips. Dodie rubbed her left shoulder. Feeling the slowly fading, nor really fading at all, scar that was Bailey’s handprint. It had healed up quite well, she forgot it was even there for most of the time. But for her dance classes and coming warmer days where sleeves just weren’t an option. The swelling had gone, the redness had faded. Her skin was still raw where Bailey had pushed her though. But it reminded her that Bailey happened. That she was real. That her story was a thing. No matter what would happen. She had happened. Not that anything would happen, obviously, knock on wood and all. But yeah. And Dodie had enough painful teenage years of practice with foundation.  
Bailey brought her hands up and forward. Holding them against each other, creating a larger web of jumbling flashes. Raaf called from where she stood, a few meters up ahead, her back to the sun. 

“Good job, pup. Now try to push it away. Get it out. You can do it.”

Dodie closed her eyes. Not really wanting to see what would happen. She heard a cheer and Bailey’s relieved huff of breath. Dodie opened her eyes. A tiny patch of grass smoking, tragically burning up between her two best and very enthusiastic friends. Both smiling at the blackened hole in the dirt like it was gold. 

“Good job! You totally got this, pup.”

Dodie was torn. Yeah, Raaf was right. Bailey just controlled her powers. Used them. She did really good. This was something entirely new. And she just did that. But it just did not feel good. Something in Dodie’s gut made her nervous. The girl was pulling out that strange stuff and making it stronger. Using it. And it was – It could be… It could get… well, it was dangerous. And not human.  
They tried some more things. More of Bailey charging herself up and letting the energy shoot through her hand. They tried aiming and gaining distance. They did some playful fighting for a little while. No powers involved. Just learning how to defend and when to attack. Dodie knew about this part. They did this back in the nest too. Using what Raaf had learned when she still did Kung Fu, before Molly took that from her. Dodie still secretly practiced with Raaf though, helping her keep that muscle memory. And Dodie secretly enjoyed watching Raaf play with Bailey now. Watching them fight and learn and laugh and move around. Hiding the urge to join them. Wanting to learn Bailey how to move her body more efficiently. Deciding against it. ‘Cause, well…. It wasn’t really about the fighting art right now. More about calming nerves and winding down again. Just some kicks and laughs and keeping control. And mostly it was about learning how to grow stronger and how to use this thing to her advantage. Which unsettled Dodie. After a while the two, now sweating, girls picked up the focus in electricity again. Raaf made Bailey try various things. Trying to stare a tree to death instead of setting it on fire. Trying to move a juggling ball Raaf held up, without touching. None of them having any clue to what extend Bailey’s electric energy could work and therefore Raaf just tried everything. Apparently even telepathy, which didn’t work, obviously. The hand thing seemed to be Bailey’s main thing though. Charging. Aiming. Waiting. Doing it again. It was the only thing Bailey actually managed to do. And she got better with it each time she tried. Progressing noticeably. The sun continued to travel across the sky. Raaf decided it was time to move onto one last new thing. Dodie had not said a word during any of it. Avoiding Bailey’s eyes whenever she looked at her, full of pride. Dodie just listened to Raaf’s words and stared down every single sizzling patch of grass they left. Raaf left it to Bailey, telling her she knew what to do. And Bailey closed her eyes again, so Dodie looked at her. Looked right at her and didn’t look away.  
She was trying to search her own body. Going as deep as she could go. Past all emotions. Dodie listened to Raaf’s encouragements. Bailey focussed on her own heartbeat and the blood rushing through her veins, finding and feeling what power she held in there. Attempting to gauge the possibilities she had. Occasionally her hand would twitch. Tiny shocks shooting through her elbows and knees. Her head lifted. And Dodie and Raaf watched in silence. Then, out of nowhere, that glow came back. It started at her toes, this time. Through her feet. It crept it’s way upwards. Inclining in its vibrancy as it went. Blue. Bailey began to glow. And Dodie looked at Raaf, wondering if this was the plan. Dodie didn’t like what she saw as she met with Raaf’s confused expression. Raaf called out to Bailey. Telling her to calm it down. Bailey didn’t seem to hear her. Raaf called out louder. 

“Hey, super girl! Alright, hey! Stop. Tone it down. Come out of it alright. Let’s leave this for later.”

Bailey screwed her eyes tight shut. 

“Hey. Let it go! Calm down, ok? Snap out of it Bailey.”

Raaf walked towards them and Dodie started to freak out slightly. Bailey’s whole body was now brightly glowing, blue, sharp waves of electricity sparking around her. 

“Bailey.”

Dodie called out. Suddenly finding her voice. Pretending no to be so scared. Upon hearing Dodie, Bailey opened her eyes. And once again the blue seeped away. She looked at Dodie, Raaf called out her name again as she reached the two of them. Wanting to know what had happened. Put a hand on her arm. Dodie could tell Raaf was masking the discomfort the touch gave her. Bailey looked beyond confused. And Dodie provided her with the information that she had started to glow. Again. All three stood close to one another. Quiet for a beat. 

“Sorry, I – didn’t know.”

That's alright. It's good. You know where to reach.”

Bailey wobbled, steadied by Raaf's hands on her arms. She sighed. Tiredly. 

“You know, I think I know what it is now. I- I mean, I don't know what it is. The glowing thing. I don't know what it does. But I know why... where it comes from. Like, I thought it could be.. but I know for sure now.”

Dodie looked at Raaf who seemed just as confused as she was. Her golden eyes were focused on Bailey however as she nudged her on, to get to the point. 

“It has only ever happened when erhm... when it's that time of the month.”

Bailey explained, her cheeks turning an even darker shade as she blushed.

“When I'm on my period.”

She continued with a chuckle before turning to Raaf, serious again. 

“D'you think my hormones or something are affecting it? Maybe I'm twice as powerful after my progesterone has spiked.”

“After your what has what now? Don't you mean Oestrogen?”

Raaf wasn't dumb, it's just that her interests lay in her visual art and comics. Neither held much truth for the accuracy of the female body. Maybe Dodie only knew what progesterone was because she wondered if it could define a level of Sapphic-ness but that wasn't the point. The point was that Bailey had a point. Because of course that made sense. For a female superhero, right? Bailey looked at Dodie, unsure. As clever and brave as she was, still doubting herself. Raaf seemed to figure it out. Excitement glowing in her eyes. Dodie knew Raaf. Knew she wouldn't want to stop now. Not when Bailey might be right, might be more in tune with her powers than ever before. Wanted to try out everything! Dodie suddenly seemed to be the only one of them to remember how only seconds ago the girl was covered in blue light emanating from every inch of her skin.

“How about we stop.” 

Dodie spoke, interrupting Raaf as soon as she opened her mouth. 

“Just for today. Raaf. Don't you think we've done enough for today? It's past noon and...”

“Do you want to stop, pup? I mean, we can try to work on just your aiming a little more. It's an easy thing.”

Bailey looked at each of her friends. From Raaf's excited, pushing look to Dodie's.

Bailey stared at her, her teeth clenching. 

“Let's practice my aim Raaf.”

“Fine! Whatever! But don't expect me to pick up the pieces when you hurt someone again!”

Dodie didn't mean to scream. Didn't mean to stomp away. Didn't mean to hurt Bailey like that. But she did. And she finished her entire pack of Marlboro before she arrived at the flat. Why was she the only one realizing how dangerous this was. Why did they have to exploit it. This wasn't just a try out or a test to see what Bailey could do. They weren't figuring out what went on inside of Bailey. They were training Bailey! And, alright, Dodie was scared. Whatever. Who wouldn't be, right?

–

It took several hours before Raaf and Bailey came back home. Dodie was in her bed and pulled the sheets over her head. Still she could hear the two laugh. Raaf constantly praising Bailey on her improvements. About her control and her aim and how much she learned today. How amazing the things she could do looked. What it could mean. Asking Bailey to add tampons to the shopping list as they would run out because Dodie was the next one due. Which was somehow funny to Raaf. Bailey did not laugh though. And Dodie had to remind herself to ask Bailey to get her some cigarettes too. Raaf refused to buy them for her because she noticed how quickly Dodie went through her packs lately. Bailey didn't dare to speak up to Dodie about her unhealthy addictions yet. Dodie heard Raaf talk loudly in the other room, getting the impression she was trying to convince herself more than Bailey, convincing her that what they did was good. That it went well. Bailey just agreed with everything Raaf said. And soon enough the silence returned in the nest. And Dodie could hear Bailey enter the bedroom. Saw the light seep in, even through her covers, as Bailey opened the door. 

“Dodie?”

“I'm not here.”

“Dodie... what happened today?”

Dodie didn't need to look at Bailey to know she was fidgeting. Moving her mouth without saying a word. Bouncing from her heels to her toes. That unsure, shy trait that still hadn't left her, that awkwardness around her friends that had began to offend Dodie a bit.  
Dodie could see her entering the room from under the covers as she, tall and large as she was, blocked the light from the door. Dodie wasn't sure if she was angry at Bailey. Dodie wasn't even sure if she was angry at Raaf. There was just something that annoyed her. Something about the two of them. Bonding against her. Bailey sighed. 

“Dodie, look -”

Dodie turned on her side, kicking the covers down a bit. She stared at Bailey's green eyes. 

“I know you're upset with me, but I want you to understand that we're not looking for danger.”

“You're literally training Bailey, not for fun, not for safety, not to understand. You're training to be strong and to use whatever is inside of you.”

“Yes, I am.”

Dodie sat up, facing the girl. 

“Why! What do you hope to gain from this? Do you not see how you're making yourself... how dangerous it is!”

Bailey stepped back as Dodie got on her feet. She gaped at Dodie. Her eyebrows furrowing, her eyes watering. 

“Don't you see that this is helping me turn this thing into something good? That I want to feel like my body is mine again. That I can be normal again.”

“Don't you see that you already are normal? You have a job, a place to stay you have us. Why are you risking all of that?”

“You wouldn't understand...”

“Yes I do! You feel like everything that happened is your fault, that you lost everything because of who you became. You feel like every single bit of who you are is somehow wrong. You want to be ok. You want to feel real again.”

Bailey's once concerned expression had become annoyed, but as Dodie spoke Bailey's face fell into a confused look. Surprised by her words. Dodie continued. 

“Well, do you not? Am I not right? Is that not how you feel? Why can't you see that we're ok with what you are? Why do you want more?”

Raaf suddenly burst into the room. Dodie looked at her best friend, realized she had been screaming all this time.

“This is your fault, Raaf.”

“Swan, listen to yourself. You're picking fights that aren't even there.”

“Oh yeah, well since are you suddenly best friends with Bailey? Huh? Do you realize how much could go wrong if you two make a wrong move? Do you realize how she could accidently expose herself at work and lose her job? Bailey! Don't you see Raaf doesn't understand that this is real life? That she thinks you're just a little comic story?” 

Raaf spoke up before Bailey could.

“Well, fuck you Dodie! Can't you see that this is not your little happy family life? I warned you when you took her in, didn't I? Hell, I warned you when even the two of us moved in together! You're the one who seems to think she's a possession to have and to wonder at! A nice little deal of some extra entertainment to live through instead of living your own bloody life. Like some interesting tale to tell! We promised to help her, did you forget about that too! Weren't you going to let it go? Your careful plans and easy little picket fence life.”

Dodie felt a sudden hate surge through her anger. How dare she talk about her personal problems. As if they had anything to do with the current situation. 'They do.' spoke a taunting voice in the back of Dodie's head, a voice that sounded too much like Raaf's voice.  
Bailey stepped out of the firing line from where she stood between both girls. Her legs hit Raaf's bed and she sat down silently. 

Dodie couldn't stop herself anymore harsh words leaving her before she could think them through. 

“You just want to have some excitement, you're just happy someone finally likes art as much as you do! You're using her to forget about how crappy Molly makes you feel, since I'm apparently not enough anymore!”

“Don't you dare bring my love life into this! Don't you dare accuse me of such a thing when you're the one pretending here! Bailey wans to turn what she has into something good after being scared of it for so long. You're asking her to push it away and bury it and pretend everything is fine and safe for some false careful plan. Doesn't that remind you of something?”

Raaf's eyes were like fire as her words burned right through Dodie's heart. Dodie couldn't feel anything but than that fire moving through her body, hurting her, burning her, vaporizing everything. Making her forget how to breath.

“Get out of my sight.”

The cursed words were too familiar for both of them. Now Dodie had said them and her voice was calm like water on her burning tongue. She watched as Raaf's eyes dimmed from tears leaking out onto her heated cheeks and quivering lips. 

“Go!”

Raaf shook her head as Dodie's rage won. 

“Go! Go get yourself fucked over by your weak excuse for a girlfriend! See how you do without me!”

Raaf stormed out with a slam of the door. Dodie sank to the ground tears in her eyes. Bailey, still seated upon Raaf's bed, stared at her awkwardly. 

“And why don't you speak up! Huh? Why don't you just say how you feel for once!”

Dodie didn't know what came over her, what childish rage took over. She buried her face in her hands, trying to stop her sobs. 

“Dodie!”

Bailey got up, pulling Dodie's hands from her face. 

“What happened? I know you didn't mean anything you said. You should go after Raaf.”

“I did, I meant everything I said. Raaf is a selfish idiot. She forgets that the rules apply to her too. She never thinks about the consequences.”

A painful silence fell in the barely lit room. Dodie wiped at her eyes and looked at the girl in front of her. Neither wanted to admit the truth in Dodie's words. A car honked somewhere out on the streets and Dodie did get up, but she walked to the kitchen instead of the door. And she poured herself a glass of wine.

“Raaf makes too many mistakes for her to go out and risk your life like that.”

Bailey didn't partake in her blame game, clearly thought differently about their training. Probably thougth a damsel in distress would pop up soon enough for her to save in a fake reality where things as guns would suddenly cease to exist. Probably thought every human being would thank her and give her money and not grow scared of her abnormality and want to cage her. Dodie poured herself another glass of wine and Bailey didn't partake in that either. Bailey did however look at Dodie with a puzzled expression on her face. 

“Did... did Raaf mean what she said too? About you.”

Dodie sighed and put her glass away. Leaving the kitchen but keeping the bottle of wine. 

“I don't wanna talk anymore.”

“You asked me to.”

“I know.”

Dodie felt miserable. She just wanted to sleep. But Bailey kept talking to her and Dodie felt a headache coming up. 

“I am done with being afraid of this thing that I have inside of me, Dodie. I want to accept it. And you don't know how I feel.”

Dodie really thought she did but instead of replying she just put the bottle to her lips and walked away again. 

“Dodie you don't. You don't know what it feels like to feel so wrong. To hide away and constantly fear that you might be exposed because you're strange. I feel wrong and unreal and I hate it! You don't know what it's like to feel like you have to try to alter yourself to fit in only to be told that alterations are wrong things once more!”

Bailey stopped Dodie at the door of their bedroom. Forcing her to look at her, forcing her to say something back. 

“I'm sorry for holding you back.”

Dodie's voice was raw from screaming at her best friend who was gone now.

“I'm not your story. You can't obsess over me you can't control me.”

Clearly Bailey didn't buy her sincerety either.  
Dodie found her way into her bed but Bailey didn't climb in with her. Dodie heard Raaf's bed creak instead. And as Bailey turned her back at Dodie from across the room, Dodie knew that Bailey was angry with her too. 

Dodie couldn't sleep. 

Even though Bailey was right across the room from her she felt incredibly distant. Dodie had never felt this alone.

When she awoke the next day she heard Bailey in their kitchen, cleaning up. Dodie turned on her other side and fell back asleep again. 

By the time another Monday came around Dodie found her way to class without speaking a single word to Bailey. She managed until midday before stepping into the library, looking around and almost running to the park. She knew what she was doing, knew who she was looking for. But she couldn't think about it. Because thinking about it would make her worry about it and that would mean forgiving. And Dodie wasn't ready. Not after what she had said to her. “I warned you when you took her in, didn't I? Hell, I warned you when even the two of us moved in together!” The words echoed in her head. “You're asking her to push it away and bury it and pretend everything is fine and safe for some false careful plan. Doesn't that remind you of something?”

Dodie made it through the rest of the day with a fake smile and nicotine distraction. 

Turning the key and entering the nest that evening, Dodie came home to a welcome smell of dinner. Bailey had already forgiven her, somehow, for some reason. Yet, when Dodie lay in bed that night she found herself alone once more. Bailey still took the other bed even though that wasn't her place. Neither was Dodie's bed, Dodie reminded herself. But she missed it. Missed that warm body next to hers. Missed the soft puffs of breath against her static hair every early morning. Missed waking up to the view of old band t-shirts revealing beautiful brown skin and collarbones and Dodie had to stop herself thinking immediately! 

There was no one to tell her off for smoking. No one to scold at her stupid jokes. There was no one to discuss a plan with when Bailey left for work. There were only two people to clean the Nest. And there was no one to sit next to Bailey and hand her a paintbrush. It was Wednesday when Dodie decided she should be that one. So Dodie sat down next to her new friend who was resting back against their couch as she flipped through some magazines. She had already ditched her overalls from work in favour of a pair of harem pants, which were baggy yet flattering and soft pants. And was rocking her newest lace crop top with frays at the end. She looked gorgeous. Dodie helplessly pulled at the straps of her own dungarees, adjusting them casually. 

“What you doin'?”

Bailey almost jumped when she whipped around to face Dodie. Dodie realized why as she could see Raaf's folder of cut outs lying next to Bailey. 

“I was bored.”

Bailey mumbled. Hiding the folder under a magazine and playing with the rings on her fingers instead of looking at dodie. Dodie composed herself. She was tired of the silence. She still had Bailey, right? And she wasn't going to let her go. She sat down on the arm rest of the couch.

“Well, I'm bored too. Can I help?”

Bailey looked at her, dumbfounded. 

“Well neither of us really know anything about making collages... and we only have one pair of scissors...”

“Right.” 

Dodie got up again. 

“I gotta prepare for my dance class for tomorrow night anyway. I'll be in my- our room.”

Dodie hated how awkward everything had become. She couldn't be around Bailey without realizing how much she missed the company she was so used too. And Bailey seemed to hold back every time the two got close. They used to work so well together. 

Dodie closed the door behind her and pressed play on her cd player, an old R&B cd of Demi Lovato's that she just adored too much began to play. Dodie she sat on her floor, listening. She really had to prepare that class, wanted something new for her kids, something cool and new, a fun challenge. She lied down on the gross carpet. Thinking hard. Then she spotted them, an old pair of white stiletto’s. Her mother's heels. The ones her mother wore at her Christian, Japanese, wedding. Dodie had stolen them from her. Her mother had always promised her she would get to marry in those shoes if she met a nice, rich man. Dodie still hadn't grown in to them but she took them with her when she left. She snatched them from under her bed and put them on. They were still a few sizes too big but that didn't matter. A slow song began to play and Dodie got up. Slowly stepping forward. Pretending to hold a partner as she slow danced around the room. Closing her eyes and swaying her head. 

Lost in thought. 

She didn't hear Bailey walk in. 

She didn't hear the song end. 

She didn't notice tears rolling down her cheeks. 

She probably looked really stupid. 

Only when the beat of a new, sexy, upbeat song began did Dodie look up. Upon seeing Bailey she fell over immediately, losing her balance in her too big heels. 

“I just felt sorry about the scissors so I thought we could maybe do some paint work or something...”

Dodie wiped at her face, embarrassed.

“I just thought you'd like to do something together and I felt quite sorry.” 

Bailey walked over to her fallen friend and sat down in front of her. 

“You don't need to feel sorry for me Bailey.”

The girl had a paintbrush in her hair, had probably put it there for safekeeping the same way that Dodie would put cigarettes behind her ear. Bailey probably forgot it was there, yet it was a quite adorable look. Bailey carefully took the heels from her feet and stared at her. 

“What were you doing?”

“I want to teach my class to dance on heels,”

Dodie decided quickly. 

“Even the boys?”

“Especially the boys.”

Bailey laughed at that and Dodie found herself smiling too. She liked the way Bailey laughed, how she closed her eyes when she did. She pulled the paintbrush out of Bailey's hair and placed it on her nightstand. Bailey followed her with her big, green eyes. 

“Can you teach me?”

Dodie nodded and Bailey helped her up. The CD had already ended so Dodie pressed play again. Of course Sorry Not Sorry started to play. Dodie laughed and Bailey screamed in delight. And fuck it all, why not!

“Slayyy Queen!”

Bailey laughed.

Dodie clapped along to the pre chorus and threw her hair around. Bailey almost fell over from laughing. 

“Dance girl! You're making me look real stupid doing this alone!”

Bailey followed her lead as she stepped and turned and did quite well. And Bailey actually was on heels. Dodie was pretty sure that they still looked stupid but it was just so funny to see Bailey shake her booty. 

Dodie took Bailey's warm hands and they jumped around the room like kids until they both collapsed on Dodie's bed. It took a while for the both of them to catch their breath and stop laughing.

“You've got talent, pup!”

“Thanks, Dot. I got a great teacher.”

Bailey smiled at her, her face so close to her own.

Dodie's nerves were over aware of Bailey's hands, still holding hers, the skin burning where they touched. Tangled on her bed. She watched Bailey, not daring to move as she stared at the girl who stared right back, still out of breath. The music painfully there as Demi's voice sang out “And I hope I never see the day that you move on and be happy without me.” Dodie chuckled awkwardly. She tried to get up but Bailey's hands moved to her shoulders as she held her down. The sparks Dodie felt no longer from Bailey's fingers. Dodie hated the way her body reacted. She had fought so hard to build this normal live. Dodie's eyes wondered down from Bailey's eyelids, her thick eyelashes, the small but still there purple bags of exhaustion, Dodie's eyes traveled down to Bailey's cute, shiny nose and the gold ring that accessorized her right nostril boldly. Cute? Well yeah she did look cute. Bailey looked beautiful. Dodie frowned at her own thoughts, what was she doing? Bailey was beautiful and she cared, she would do anything for this girl. Dodie noticed the accentuated bridge to her plumb, slightly parted, cherry red lips. A jumpy feeling Dodie recognized from earlier that day came back again.

“I missed you.”

Dodie could see the words form on her soft lips before she could hear Bailey speak. It was like all her senses were failing her. Only feeling the girl on top of her. Dodie quickly forced herself to look up again, meeting forrest green eyes. 

“I missed you too.”

Dodie said truthfully. And she forced her body to move as she wiggled out from underneath Bailey's hands. 

What was that feeling? What changed? Everything had changed! Everything was different and everything was wrong. But Bailey was still Bailey, Dodie was still Dodie. And Raaf... Raaf was...

The cd player, cruel as ever, Demi's “You don't do it for me anymore.” began to play. 

Dodie turned around. And Bailey let go. Dodie put her arms around her chest, emberassed. This wasn't her. But it was now. It was. 

Bailey didn't move away. Her body still behind her, warm. 

“Dodie.. -”

Dodie knew the question Bailey was about to ask. Knew Bailey had been repeating Raaf's words over and over again in her own head. And Dodie was glad that Raaf wasn't here. Dodie was glad Bailey wasn't facing her. Because Dodie knew she owed Bailey the truth. Knew that if Dodie wasn't honest Bailey would come to her own conclusions. The truth was better. And Dodie knew they both had to share their past with one another if they were going to make their friendship work.

“Before I say anything I need you to know that I've been to theraphy right when it happened. That I'm fine now. That it wasn't fair of Raaf to bring this up.”

Dodie felt her face turn red as a sudden sadness gripped her. Bailey trailed her fingers through Dodie's hair slowely, comforting. 

“I understand.”

And Dodie knew she did. So she told her. Quickly and without looking at Bailey. She told her about her mother. About her mother's illness. About the new version of her mother Dodie learned to live with after the birth of her youngest sister. She felt Bailey tense behind her but didn't want any reaction, didn't want any sympathy that would make it all so very real again. Dodie told Bailey about the days after her mother's suicide. How Dodie took over. How Dodie was driven by her mothers wish to keep their name pure. To make their family normal again. Approved. And how Dodie one day began to scream at her little sisters out of nowhere. Angry for eveyr little mistake they made. And how her father told her to get out. Dodie trembled as she paused. Hated how distanced she felt from this story. As she had told it time and time again. 

“I met Raaf the day I left. Raaf had been kicked out of Molly's house. We moved in together.”

“Did Raaf get you into theraphy?”

“I tried to kiss her once, and it kind of gave me a panic attack. Because I'm a girl you know... and my mother... well Raaf noticed I had some issues with control. So we got help.”

Bailey's breath hitched. And Dodie quickly ensured her again. 

“I'm ok now. God... I feel so emberassed.”

“Why?”

“I was crazy.” 

“Dodie?”

Bailey turned Dodie around, careful hands. Dodie bit her lip trying to hide the tremble in them. She wasn't crazy, she knew that. She just had a little panic problem when it came to the control problem. But crazy sounded less insane. 

“I don't care if you're crazy.”

Dodie smiled at her friend.

“I have some weird blue energy ball in me, how do you think I feel?”

Dodie genuily laughed at that. 

“I'm sorry I overreacted. I was just worried and I just... I don't know.”

“Thank you for telling me.”

Bailey pulled herself up on her elbows and kissed Dodie softely on her forhead. Dodie could feel her cheecks heat. And as panic welled up again Dodie reminded herself that it was fine. Right? Maybe. But just not yet. Dodie looked at Bailey as she lay back down again. There was something about her that Dodie had been wondering herself. Maybe now was the right time. 

“Bailey, will you tell me where your parents are?”

Bailey went rigid but didn't shut her out. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a second. When she opened her eyes again she smiled at Dodie calmly. 

“I will show you tomorrow. I think it might be good for me to face my demons too.”

Dodie didn't need to ask what Bailey meant. Knew that this prooved what Dodie feared. Her parents died in the fire. 

“I”m sorry about what happened to you Bailey.”

“I”m sorry for you too Dodie.”

“Thanks.”

As silence fell around them Dodie realized there was no awkwardness or panic. No weird feelings or hesitations. They both kenw everyhting now. And that somehow made it easier for Dodie to breath, as she lay in Bailey's arms. It wasn't unsettling to know their most painful memories hang around them, dusting the air. It made her feel free. As if they were drifting around themselves. Understandment perfectly between them both. 

A down beat song filled the silence up with warm lyrics and Dodie watched as Bailey closed her eyes. Watched until her breaths evened out. Everything was perfect. Just like this.

Until a small sting reminded her that it wasn't. Because Raaf had ruined them. And Dodie had ruined it with Raaf. She had allowed Bailey to know her past. But it wasn't Raaf's place to tell. And it was in Raaf's arms she once imagined to fall asleep. But Dodie couldn't stand to lose anymore. She felt numb. Tired of fighting these old demons all week. Dodie raised her head and she inhaled sharply through her nose. Anger returned like a new coping mechanism. Focused on the smiling, sleeping, peaceful, beautiful girl in fron of her as she quickly wiped tears off of her own cheeks. Congratulations. She thought. You lost the most important girl in your whole entire life. But it wasn't true, somehow. Raaf must be celebrating that she finally left Dodie behind and could go back to Molly wholeheartedly. But that wasn't true either. Congratulations then to Bailey, who probably thought Dodie must have gone insane. No! No she hadn't. She wouldn't, not even when Dodie knew she would wake up with her mascara all over her own face. She couldn't help crying. But that was fine. Cause her heart wouldn't break anymore. Dodie made sure of that. Her heart was the thing she would make the hardest to break. Congratulations. Dodie thought instead. You did it. You've lost everything. But Bailey was there. Holding her. And Dodie was ok. Someone had to pretend everything was normal, everything was fine. But it couldn't be her. Because her life just never seemed to ever be normal. And Dodie decided, that very night, that she wouldn't fight that anylonger. Not anymore. It just might take some time to get used to.  
And Dodie fell asleep in the barely lit room, Bailey's hands holding Dodie tight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See, still here and writing!
> 
> Feedback gives me life! And I don't know what the hell I'm doing. Am I over exposing these characters too much?  
> I was ten seconds away from posting this chapter on the 30th of September when I decided to rewrite the ending completely.  
> Now they're all fighting, ain't that fun? At least Dodie seems to deal with her feelings for once.  
> Also, Demi's new album is out, can you tell how excited I am? 
> 
> \--  
> Next time on ACFAS: A peak into the future. Are they happy? Where's Raaf?  
> (-Questions only I know the answer to.)  
> __  
> Ok. Bye!


	8. Running Rituals

2nd of August – 9 years from now

“Fucking fuck.” 

The room is barely lit. Giving it a dull and worn look. Bailey’s hands are holding Dodie tight. They’re brushing over Dodie’s back as Dodie steps forwards, struggling to keep her mouth on Bailey’s. Bailey’s fingers bruising Dodie’s hips. Dodie kisses her hungrily. Trying to stay as quiet as they can, kissing each other fleetingly yet feverishly. Bailey’s back hits their bathroom wall and Dodie curses again. Running out of breath as her lips leave Bailey’s. Bailey’s hands travel up. Threading through Dodie’s hair. Undoing her messily braided bun that had taken Dodie the entirety of an hour to put up that morning. Dodie feels bossy in a business way, with her hair up like that. Which is fantastic. Even if it means there’s no time for her red lipstick. Which, in hindsight, she is glad for.  
Bailey pulls at Dodie’s hair. She massages her neck. Her fingers trace behind Dodie’s earlobes. Dodie can feel her everywhere. Her touch on every inch of her body. Dodie can feel Bailey’s nose, poking at Dodie’s check, each time she moves. Golden nose ring cold between them. Dodie can feel their hips colliding as they rush forwards. Both of them allowing their hands to dance along their lover’s body. Heart’s speeding. 

“Shit.” 

Dodie struggles to vocalize herself through a rush of breath as Bailey’s hand softly strokes Dodie’s chin. Dodie’s hands reach Bailey’s bra line, disappearing underneath her crop top. Small, electric shocks prickling just the right amount against Dodie’s skin. Unstopping, turning her on. 

All of that is happening, while neither of them break the kiss. The only coherent thing, a messy clash of love and newly arisen lust. Quietly in their bathroom. That kiss. It’s Bailey’s movements, guiding Dodie’s. 

Dodie dares to open her eyes and steals a glance as her hands travel across Bailey’s bare back. Back to her stomach. Across her soft tummy. Hard lines of abs only slightly raised. Goosebumps appear where her fingers touch. Slowly lifting her hands up higher. Dodie glances up into Bailey’s eyes. And those great, green ones stare right back while at her. That beautiful colour the only thing Dodie notices among the blindingly, white tiled room. Bailey blinks once. Her eyes only opening halfway. Lost in the moment. Dodie is mesmerized. And barely even realizes Bailey leaning in for another kiss. 

And then…

“Mommy?”

The two women break apart. All that had felt like one, now two once more. Two separate bodies. Pulling nervously at the folds in their clothes. 

“Preston.” 

Dodie mutters. 

“What’s wrong, baby? Why are you out of bed?”

“How did you get out of bed?”

Bailey interjects. 

“New baby is awake.”

Preston tells his mothers proudly. Pointing at the open door with his small fingers. Completely missing the direction of his sister’s room, but meaning well.   
Bailey lifts their three-year-old son up in her arms as Dodie exits the bathroom to get little Penny. The poor, tiny girl had been throwing tantrums every night. Not used to her new family yet. Preston had been the same, and he had been two years old when they adopted him. Dodie makes a short pitstop at her son’s bedroom to take a look at his bed before tending to her daughter. She sighs. They would have to take a look at his bars, again. 

\--

“Hey, Preston?” 

Dodie starts, gaining her son’s attention whose eyes are trained on the plastic cup the toddler is ready to throw against either Bailey or Penny’s head. 

“You wanna try and see who runs the fastest?” 

Bailey raised her eyebrows at her wife. (Her wife! It still makes Dodie’s stomach do summersaults, but good ones. Butterfly ones.)

“Oh, babe. Preston has been sitting down for over seven minutes now. Don’t you think he did very well?” 

Dodie asks, trying to silently convey to Bailey that they’ve trained Preston’s attention span long enough for tonight’s dinner session. That a little treat was due for his hard work. 

“You’re right! I think that might be a new record actually, little man!”

Bailey replies, now getting Dodie’s intentions. They both had broken their heads over a handful of parenting books, like ‘My kid’s hyperactive, now what?’; ‘Growing up with ADHD’; ‘Parenting 101 with a short attention span’ and ‘ADHD a parental guide’. Even though their boy is way too young for any of this informative guidance to help just yet. Dodie wants to make sure they’d give their children the best opportunity at life, wants to love them the best way she can. And Bailey had slightly freaked out at Preston’s very early diagnosis, so they both have been doing excessive research. So far so good. ADHD is fun. Although a bit loud and quite present. And they don’t have to worry about school and medications just yet.

“Alright. Off you two go. And I don’t want either of you back here until the both of you are tired enough for a bed time story!”

Preston cheers as he jumps off his chair. Forgetting all about the cup and who hadn’t been hit with it yet. And Bailey gets up too, gives Dodie a quick kiss and follows their son as the two of them run around the dining table. Chasing each other playfully. Waking Penny who had dozed off in her seat. And Dodie cleans their plates off the table and wipes the counter top clean, leaving some left overs for tonight in the fridge. They never really get to have dinner themselves, with those two tiny human beings at the table. Dodie puts a bottle of milk in the microwave as Bailey and Preston head for the living room, laughing loudly. Preston pretends his mommy is a dragon monster and Bailey does a crazy impression of whatever that should look like. Dodie feels her heart grow for their joyful boy and picks Penny up from her seat. Leaving the two to it as she carries her daughter upstairs. She carries her daughter to her bedroom with a bottle of warm milk. The small girl still so young. Everything, everyday seems to be a first again. Dodie never wanted to have a child herself. Not with the memory of her own mother still so fresh in her mind. Dodie was too scared of how a birth could affect either her or Bailey. But that doesn’t mean Dodie doesn’t wish to have a family. And Bailey had been more than pleasantly surprised to hear this. They had both decided to find a good therapist when they entered the adoption process. Just to calm Dodie’s nerves. Still, Dodie would have never thought she would find herself with such a young girl in her arms. A daughter to care and love. And to guide, every single step of the way. And as she softly opens Penny’s bedroom door she still can’t believe her luck. The trust that Bailey has. The love she feels for their children. It’s something beautiful and unconditionally. Like the love she holds for her sisters. Yet this is something new. Something completely theirs. Bailey and Dodie. And Preston and Penny. Their little family. 

They have settled so well. Dodie thinks to herself as she feeds their daughter, rocking her in her arms. Watching her fight to keep from closing her eyes. Staring at her mother intensely. Their little family of four, moving like sprockets in a clock. It had been like this right from the start, From the very moment they moved into their house. It makes Dodie happy. It makes Dodie understand why Bailey believes in miracles.  
Bailey started to talk to Dodie about the possibility of actually believing in some god. And yeah, it sounds like a big jump. Bailey understands that it is. But Dodie understands, or tries to at least, that Baileys wants to believe there is someone bigger then it all. Someone who had meant for all of this. Someone Bailey wants to turn to and be thankful for, for giving her Dodie and a second chance at life. Dodie thinks it's absolutely ridiculous to think that she was sent to Bailey, sent to make her see that someone thought Bailey's life is worth saving. But, if that's Bailey's attempt at logic and reason… who is Dodie to stop her? Bailey knows that Dodie doesn't believe in a greater good, in a god or fate. They talk about it. And Dodie tries to understand her point of view She takes the time to consider her thoughts, like she had to as a kid, when her mother took her to church, but she can't. Bailey hasn't even decided which god to believe in yet. She likes Christmas too much to turn back to her old faith. And Bailey knows Dodie isn't very comfortable around Christians, even though she tries. Dodie's wife shouldn't have to defend her need to have faith however anyway. Because Bailey has only known hurt and loneliness and death for such a long time of her youth and all that tears at her walls. And this, this- that she has with Dodie. All of Dodie. All that came with Dodie. It made Bailey believe someone up there saw Bailey and took pity in her. And it makes her feel like she has to pray every single night to thank an omnipresent figure for blessing her. And Dodie should not be offended by that. She just wishes Bailey would see the world for what it was again, instead of thanking someone who isn't even there for all the hard work everyone else did. But Dodie shouldn't be jealous. And Dodie shouldn’t feel offended or invaded. It’s just that this is a bump in the smooth surface. This is a thing that still annoys Dodie. A thing Bailey does. And a thing that won’t go away. Which means that there is always this tiny part of Dodie that is annoyed with the girl she married. Which makes them not perfect.   
But that is fine. Even if Dodie has to manually remind herself so often that she can love Bailey even if they’re flawed. That their family is perfect still. No. No! Not perfect. Not perfect at all. But happy. And good. And loving. And unpredictable and uncontrollable. Which makes them perfect in its own, special way.   
So, they let faith into her household, just a tiny little bit, because it makes her wife happy. Because it is what Bailey feels like she needs to do. And Dodie respects her choices and Bailey knows. Bailey thanks her with kisses and promises and a whole lot more. Making sure that Dodie never feels she has to share her love with anyone else. And Dodie makes just sure of that when they find their bed at night.   
And to be honest, the praying at night really was the only thing ever really noticeable. Other than that, they worked perfectly. Bailey had blossomed like there had been tiny seeds in her head when she moved in with Dodie and Raaf. Now, with a home and a family, a tiny garden seemed to have grown in her mind. The new trees, trusting and hopeful. It's kind of a weird metaphor but like, the point is that Bailey feels like she is better. She barely uses her powers anymore. Yet when she does, she does good with them. And if Bailey feels like she needs to thank someone for this change, thank someone who stands above it all, someone not as close as Dodie, then she should. And Dodie sometimes feels like it's the exact same thing as when she talks to her own father. Sees the same need to tell and vent and ask for guidance without really needing an answer. And Bailey does good at Dodie's side and Dodie does good at Bailey's side and they both try to be to be as good as they can be.

The first time Dodie caught Bailey praying had been after Dodie and Raaf graduated. Bailey had snuck into the bedroom to say a quick prayer. Dodie had stared at her like the girl had grown another head and she asked her all kinds of questions. Not understanding. Not even sure if Bailey herself understood. And Bailey had stopped doing it all together. Until- until a few years ago. But Dodie lets her do it. Of course she does. Bailey's faith never impacted her own life anyway. And Dodie knows it won't be a big part of their life nor of that of their kids. It's just there. A tiny little thing Bailey feels like she needs to do every night before bed. And Dodie even joined in once or twice. Because she had her own people she missed talking to. And it was extremely awkward because neither of them really knew how to pray properly anyway. But they would not tell anyone that. And, of course, they would one day have to discuss if they wanted to pass Bailey's believes on to their son and daughter and, if so, in what way. But that's something they both knew best to leave for later. Dodie is quite sure they both agree that it's quite pointless to raise your child on any kind of religion anyway. So, it wasn't even a real problem to think about.

And, yeah. They have settled so well. Their little family. Filled with love and happiness. Moving like sprockets in a clock. Almost perfect. 

And as Penny is safe and soundly tucked in with a tiny, lightning shaped night light on. Dodie tells her a little story, sings her a song. A song Bailey remembered from her childhood and taught Dodie. Penny's tiny eyes slowly close as her breath evens out. Dodie hears Penny's brother downstairs. Hear him squealing, probably trying to climb the couch like the mountain it is to the tiny boy, to get away from her laughing, out of breath mother. They're crazy. Dodie adores them. Dodie loves them. Dodie likes the ritual of it. The ease. The simplicity and normality. This one thing that will always stay the same. Or for a couple of years at the very least. The routine of their children. Besides all that has happened and all that will still go wrong in their lives, there is now this one thing that Dodie knows. One new song to which she will always remember the tune. And it's an easy one. Because Dodie once was bored and yearning for a story. And Dodie got more than she wished for. And Dodie did not complain. But, even Dodie got tired sometimes. So, to get to take Penny upstairs like she once did for her sisters. Change her diaper, change her into her pj's and Snuggy. Hold her as she sips warm milk and, if she's too cheery, tell her a bedtime story she cannot yet comprehend. To watch her fall asleep. Feel her breath even out. Lay her down and for Dodie to go downstairs. Find the woman she promised to share the rest of her life with. Find her Bailey. To get to care for something so tiny and beautiful only to feel this satisfied and lucky to fall asleep next to her ridiculously tall best friend, and to do a routine so well and happily. Well… It is peace to Dodie. It is calm and good. And it is what she needs. 

Dodie kisses Bailey, already having missed her warm embrace as they finally find their way to their bed that night. Bailey kisses her softly. Smiles at her and holds her hands. Dodie kisses each of Bailey’s knuckles. 

Dodie understands now that nothing can ever be perfect. And Dodie knows, that even while that is true, this, this right here, is happiness. This house, filled with laughter and love and mistakes to learn from, this is bliss. 

– 

Dodie wakes up to find the bed empty. But it doesn’t startle her. Because the bed doesn’t feel empty. Bailey’s warmth and Bailey’s smell is still right next to her. And the house is filled with warm sunlight.   
There is no loneliness between these walls. Dodie closes her eyes to enjoy the warmest sounds to fill her ears, loving every second of it. Laughter and pitter-patter of feet can be heard from right around the corner. And Bailey is unsurprisingly, running around with Preston again. The two are like Duracell Battery Bunnies. Everlasting. And Dodie joins them because she is a show off. Teasing their son who is jumping and falling over his own feet from excitement. 

It turns into an epic game of chasing and catching. Bailey chasing her son and Dodie right behind her. Feet loud against the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finished this chapter the day before Halloween.  
> I've been too busy to just push 'post without preview' for seven whole days.   
> Why do I do this to myself. I don't even know how I do it. 
> 
> But here we are, a new chapter. And ready for another one.   
> If I'm being honest, I missed being busy. I really did. Let's see if I can still do it. 
> 
> __  
>  Next time on ACFAS: We’re back with Dodie in the present. As Bailey finds herself running for her life.   
> __


	9. The Big Chase

27th of March - now

Feet hard against the ground. Eyes trained on /her/. Dodie ran. The hard gravel scratched at her ballet shoes, but Dodie didn’t even feel it. Somewhere close behind her Bailey screamed something. But Dodie didn’t even hear. Confused students jumped aside as Dodie rushed past them. But Dodie didn’t even see. She just ran. Everyone would be able to see what Dodie wanted to do to her. It was the middle of the day and they were on campus ground. But Dodie didn’t even care. Dodie would never let this bitch get away. Dodie would not let it happen. Shame and anger overtook Dodie Pointer completely.  
Anger for everything that girl had done. Shame for never noticing these things. Dodie had let her do them. Because she chose to be oblivious.  
Last night now seemed months away.   
These last eleven days were like years.   
Years that Dodie had failed to prevent.   
Years that Dodie couldn’t undo.   
Eleven days did not do justice for the things that had been going on.   
Dodie would make her pay for them, wanted to make sure they’d feel like years to her too. 

Last night…   
Bailey had cooked dinner for her and Dodie last night. The two of them finished their dishes to the very last crumbs. The two of them lay satisfied and comfortably close together on their couch. But the sound of the Nest’s door unlocking made them break apart. Startled. As if they should not have been this close. Both girls sat upright. Each of them on a far end of the couch. Staring up, at the door that opened. Then Raaf was there. Standing on the threshold. Dodie jumped up in surprise. 

“Frott.”

Dodie spoke, amazed. It was the nickname Dodie used to use, although it was just her surname. Raaf said nothing back. Stood rigid on the doorstep. Dodie walked over to her best friend slowly. She saw Raaf’s hands trembled. The girl still made no move to enter her home as Dodie approached her. 

“Raaf?”

“Are you still angry at me, Swan?”

“No. No, of course I’m not.”

Dodie didn’t need to think twice. Of course she wasn’t mad at Raaf. She stepped over the threshold too and pulled Raaf in a tight embrace. 

“And are you still angry with me?”

“No. No I’m not.”

Raaf’s voice trembled as much as the rest of her did. And she didn’t hug Dodie in return. Just put her chin on Dodie’s shoulder as Dodie held her. And Raaf let out a shaky breath as Dodie voiced her growing concern for the German girl. 

“You ok?”

Raaf nodded in a slow reply. It did nothing but worry Dodie even more. This wasn’t the Raaf Dodie knew. The quick witted, loud and confident young woman. Dodie pulled back and looked at her roommate. Raaf avoided her stare. Something had happened. Yet Raaf’s sudden start into motion threw off Dodie’s trail of thoughts. Raaf finally entered the living room and kicked her shoes off. She rubbed her eyes with a trembling hand. 

Something had happened. 

Bailey got up from the couch too. Made a move towards Raaf but stopped herself as their friend turned her back to them and left for the bathroom. Bailey quickly busied herself by gathering their plates. Dodie stopped her on her way to the kitchen. Both unsure of what to do or how to act. 

Something had happened. 

Dodie helped Bailey clean up in silence. Every hushed conversation either tried to start fell short. Raaf’s return held an overwhelming presence in their minds. And as the two girls entered their bedroom that night, they found Raaf already in her own bed. Her back to them. Her gaze distantly staring at the wall. 

“Raaf? Are you alright?”

Dodie sat down next to her trembling friend. 

“Did you get ill? Can I get you something?”

Raaf shook her head. Dodie lay her hand on her best friend’s forehead anyway.   
Suddenly quick and alive, Raaf grabbed her outstretched hand tightly. Dodie didn’t mean to get startled but Raaf really scared her now. 

“Babe. What’s wrong? You’ve barely spoken a word. I haven’t seen you in days. I…”

Raaf pulled her best friend down with her, hugged her so they lay down together, facing one another. Raaf’s golden brown eyes wide and looking intensely at Dodie. The force of her voice suddenly returning to her as she spoke. 

“Nothing’s wrong. I’m sorry Dodie.”

Raaf let go of her hand as she moved to cup Dodie’s cheek. 

“I missed you.”

“We’ve missed you too. I should’ve…”

Dodie’s apology was stopped as Raaf moved in. Pressed her lips to Dodie’s. Kissing… Dodie. No. No, no… Bailey stubbed her toe and Dodie shot up, pushing herself up on her elbows, leaving Raaf in between the sheets. The warmth of Raaf’s soft lips still lingering upon Dodie’s mouth. Dodie involuntarily glanced at Bailey who had hastily turned her back to her friends and distracted herself by climbing into Dodie’s bed and pretending to get settled. Raaf fell apart underneath Dodie’s arms. Her breath hitched and tears sprang from her eyes as she covered her face beneath her hands. But Dodie saw her utterly pained expression before she hid away. Dodie stared at Raaf’s hands for a few seconds, confused and perplexed. Bailey managed to turn around and faced the girls in concern too. She whispered Raaf’s name softly from her end of the room. Dodie had to shake the lingering sparks of the kiss she’d failed to dodge from her mind. ‘Cause what? What!? She’d kissed her. She was back. Raaf. And Bailey was alone in Dodie’s bed. Now. And something was off. And would Raaf know this was Dodie’s first kiss? Would it count? Had Raaf been Dodie’s first kiss? Why did it feel wrong? Bailey called out to Raaf again. Concern thick in her voice and something was wrong… Raaf. Something had happened to her best friend. To her Raaf. 

“Raaf… Did… did something happen between you and Molly?” 

Bailey asked. This calculated question, however, made Raaf cry even harder. As she shook her head violently. Sobs shook her whole body. Raaf’s breath got quicker and quicker and became shorter and shorter. So Dodie took Raaf in her arms. She lay down with the panicking girl. Held her tight against her chest. Shushed her and rocked her. Dodie watched Bailey turn the lights off as she brushed through Raaf’s short hair calmingly. It felt awkward. Somehow. Raaf was never vulnerable. Never small. Always big and strong and loud. Dodie whispered sweet nothings into Raaf’s ear. Promised her she was here for her. That she was safe. That she loved her. Raaf just shook her head until her breath evened out. Dodie spend the rest of the night worrying.

\--

The morning came faster then expected.   
And Raaf seemed to have gathered herself up and back together throughout the night. As she woke up slowly in Dodie’s arms she blinked her sleep away. And as she stretched, the movements of the girl in Dodie’s arms woke her up too. Raaf untangled herself out of her best friend’s arms. Both girls yawned and got up. 

“Good morning.” 

Raaf croaked, smiling apologetically at Dodie, 

“Hello. You alright then?”

Dodie asked her softly. Raaf nodded as they both shuffled to their bathroom, slowly. Dodie could not have helped herself. She stared at Raaf’s lips as they both brushed their teeth. Raaf had kissed her. Had given her her first kiss. Even though Raaf probably didn’t know this. Somehow it troubled Dodie. 

Bailey woke up a little while later. While Dodie and Raaf got dressed. 

“Good morning.”

Bailey murmured in a deep morning voice.

“Good morning.”

Dodie chirped at the same time as Raaf. Although Raaf put a ‘pup’ at the end.

Dodie locked eyes with Bailey for a short second. Both aware of how much they missed this. The three of them. Like this. It had been Dodie and Bailey for eleven days. And it had taken them so long to get comfortable around each other without Raaf there. But they did, in the end, get comfortable. Grew accustomed to their dynamic in these last few days. Found support in one another. Dodie and Bailey could talk about things that Dodie couldn’t talk about with Raaf anymore. Everything was new to Bailey. And that had given Dodie so much comfort. And Bailey had opened up even further in these past few days. They both had shared their parts. But Bailey also opened up to Dodie in a new way. In the way they began to do things together. They taught one another how to dance and how to paint. And they did their make-up together. And they did their reading together. And they watched stupid reality shows together. And those were all small stupid things. But they had changed their relationship so much. Dodie had enjoyed doing them together with Bailey. Reading the newspaper together because they both were just as interested in each news section and their last fight had resulted into the paper getting soaked in cereal and milk. And Dodie’s mornings were so cosy, together with Bailey, a bowl of cereal and their newspaper. Sometimes Dodie even forgot to have her morning smoke because she was so warm and happy where she was.   
But now, with Raaf back. Dodie realized how much she needed her. How much Dodie needed her Raaf back in her life. And Dodie knew that Bailey needed Raaf too. So much more than she even remembered. The days just weren’t the same without the way that Raaf would fill them up. Dodie needed Raaf in her routine. Even if she snatched the newspaper from their table and set her scissors in them while drinking her morning yoghurt as she filled her backpack with cut out pages of unread newspapers. Getting ready for her class. 

Bailey gave Dodie a small smile. 

“So, finally back to school then, Raaf?” 

“Oh, shut it, you!”

Getting over the tragic loss of her morning news read with Bailey, Dodie took on to Raaf’s new banter. She really did seem to be back. Yet Dodie wasn’t sure if she’d mistaken a nonchalant shrug for a stifle in Raaf’s shoulders before she loosened herself up with that snarky reply and a roll of tape sent flying at Bailey. If Dodie had imagined it, then Raaf was back! Their Raaf. This was how it was supposed to go. 

The morning went by in a happy haze for the three girls, it seemed. As they picked up right where they had left off eleven days ago. 

Until Dodie’s phone buzzed during her free period.

Dodie had just changed into her dance attire when she got the text. 

‘Dodie I need you to cme with me to my Mr. Dean.’ – Raaf. 

Alright. Weird. Was there something Raaf’s head of faculty, Mr. Dean, needed Dodie for? Maybe it was about the magazines she took. But that would be an issue for Dodie’s professor’s, not Raaf’s.

‘Right now.’ – Raaf. 

‘Please.’ – Raaf.

Alright.  
Dodie snatched her bag and slung it around her shoulder as she left the dusty room with shelves behind her as she wondered up the stairs. Dodie didn’t really care about changing anyway. She wore some loose sweatpants, a tight top and some soft gym shoes that didn’t really give her feet any support. But she wasn’t gonna change for some short conversation with Raaf’s head of faculty.   
What Dodie had not anticipated, however, was the extra person in the otherwise empty classroom. When Dodie walked in. That person was already in the room with Raaf and Mr. Dean as Dodie entered. Dodie spotted her, sitting next to Raaf at the teacher’s desk, with the head of faculty in the teacher’s chair on the other side of the desk, facing them. Dodie had no place to sit. So, she was left to hover awkwardly behind Raaf. As that girl had already taken the seat next to her best friend. Molly. She flashed a fake smile at Dodie from where she sat. Oh so very merry with the position she had. Evil grin and all. 

“Now that /she/’s here, can we finally get to the point of this meeting? I have more important things to waste my time on than my girlfriend’s education.”

Molly spoke. But she said it with a soft tone, in a lovely manner which sugar coating almost made Dodie throw up. Raaf glanced over her shoulder, sought out Dodie’s eyes. A grateful look on her face. Then she shrunk in on herself once more. Her head sinking between her shoulders. Raaf stared at the man in front of them as she spoke impossibly softly. Addressing Molly but, not looking at her. 

“You’re not my girlfriend.”

Raaf whispered softly. Playing with her hands. 

“Girls. Girls. I truly do not care about any kind of relationship either one of you has with the other.”

Mr. Dean, Raaf’s well named Dean spoke up with a sigh. Clearly exasperated from having to deal with young adults all day. 

Molly whispered something under her breath that Dodie couldn’t catch from where she stood. But Raaf’s expression spoke books. The colour drained from her face and her eyes cast downwards. Raaf made herself look so small. So vulnerable, even next to Molly’s slender look. 

It was insane for Dodie to witness the effect Molly had on Raaf. How her whole body language changed. Raaf pulled her knees up to her chest. It was a shocking sight for Dodie to see Raaf not in power. Not on top of the conversation. Alienating. 

“Now, to the point!”

Mr. Dean spoke. Dodie tore her eyes from Raaf’s fragile situation to the man. 

“Three days ago, I received a phone call from you, Molly. Asking for Raaf’s withdrawal from college.”

“What!? Are you mad?”

Dodie couldn’t believe this! Raaf had fought so hard for her education. She was so close to getting her degree in arts… Molly!   
Molly sighed lazily as Dodie balled her fists in anger. Ready to scream at her stupid face. Molly just directed her gaze at Mr. Dean confidently.

“Dodie, if you’d please behave yourself.”

He spoke, just as unmoved as Molly was. Dodie had to restrain her reflexes to not hit either of them. 

“Can’t you just make her leave the room, sir? She’s got nothing sensible to bring to this conversation, clearly.”

Molly asked, batting her eyelashes sweetly.

“Now, Molly Dodie over here has enough right to be in this meeting as you do. Which funnily enough is no, no right to be here.” 

Mr. Dean spoke. Unfazed still. This made Molly shut up and sit back in her chair. 

“Now, girls, can I continue?”

All three girls nodded silently. 

“Thank you. Now… As I was saying. Three says ago Molly asked for the college to drop Raaf’s name. Which is, in Raaf’s situation, with your ever-growing hours of absence, not an uncommon request. And one most professors gladly co-sign in the event of an under-preforming and slacking student. No questions asked, no eyebrows raised.”

“Right. So that’s done. Grand. Great talk. Can we please leave?”

Molly interrupted again, impatiently. 

“If…”

Mr. Dean spoke. Truly annoyed for the first time.

“…I may continue – “

He followed up. And took his time before he did continue. 

“Raaf, I am willing to agree with your request to drop out. I do, however, knowing your history with this campus, as Dodie might be well aware of herself, have one question. Just one.” 

Dodie met Raaf on this campus ground. The day her dad kicked her out. The day Raaf dropped out and got kicked out by Molly. That’s how they met and found the Nest together. 

Mr. Dean looked at Raaf. 

“Raaf. After three years, please tell me. Why are you giving up?”

“Because it’s pointless.”

Molly said coolly, at the same time as Dodie spoke. 

“She’s not. She’s not giving up.”

Dodie grabbed Raaf’s shoulder, making her look at her. 

“Raaf, you’re gonna graduate!” Dodie told her.

“It’s worthless.” Molly broke in. 

“She’s not!” Dodie screamed back. 

“Stop!”

Raaf said. Her objection aimed at both girls.

Mr. Dean spoke before either could continue. 

“I’d like to thank all three of you for attending this meeting. I have, however decided to postpone Molly’s request on Raaf’s behalf. Raaf, I’m sorry, but you’re not allowed to drop out. Your resignation has hereby been denied. If you could all now leave this room.”

A silence fell. 

A tensive stillness in the room. 

Molly was the first one to get up and leave the room. Raaf then tried to follow her but was stopped by her head of faculty. 

“Raaf. If you find yourself, still willing to leave your education behind, I will happily sign your drop out form. But the decision must be yours. Understood?”

Raaf nodded, but Dodie could see the tears well up in her eyes from where she stood. 

Now it was just Dodie and Mr. Dean in the classroom. An awkward moment passed between the both of them as Dodie stood up too. 

“Sit. Raaf’s… She doesn’t deserve this shit. She’s so talented. Please don’t let her drop out.”

“That’s not up to me Miss Pointer.”

Dodie sighed. 

“I know.”

She agreed. And suddenly she understood why this meeting was scheduled. She looked at Mr. Dean, once more, thankful and then she left the room too. 

She had to find Raaf. Dodie had to find Raaf.   
She half jogged, half walked through the building. Quickly texting Bailey. Who had gotten one of Dodie’s old phone’s that Raaf had not managed to break just yet. 

‘Please come to campus. Molly was here. You have to take Raaf home.’ – Dodie. 

Having scanned every floor and finding neither Raaf nor Molly, Dodie walked to the campus ground between this building and the one where Dodie’s lectures were. 

She lit a cigarette. But before she even manged to take a hit, Dodie found her best friend. Dodie spotted Raaf standing at the gate of the campus ground. Molly stood right beside her, pushed her forcefully, shoved her.   
Dodie threw her cigarette aside and ran to them. Rain began to fall softly. Even before Dodie reached them, she could hear Molly’s evil words. 

“Why are you even pretending to be worth all this. Your art means nothing. Your friendships mean nothing. You mean nothing.”

Somewhere in the corner of her eye, Dodie saw Bailey. Bailey was running too. 

Molly tried to pull Raaf along with her as she attempted to leave. Having spotted Dodie now. But Dodie got there before Raaf could have moved and Molly let go of Raaf’s hand before Dodie could have reached her. 

“You evil bitch!”

Dodie yelled. But Molly made a run for it. Tried to flee from Dodie. 

Dodie’s feet were hard against the ground. Her eyes were trained on her. Dodie ran. Ran past Raaf and her tearstained face. Raaf’s attempt to reach out to her best friend and stop her missed. 

The hard ground scratched against her ballet shoes but Dodie didn’t even feel it. Somewhere close behind her Bailey screamed something. But Dodie didn’t even hear. Confused students jumped aside as Dodie rushed past them. But Dodie didn’t even see. She just ran. Everyone would be able to see what Dodie wanted to do to her, it was the middle of the day and they were on campus ground. But Dodie didn’t even care. Dodie would never let this bitch get away. Dodie would not let it happen. Shame and anger overtook Dodie Pointer completely.   
Anger, for the things that girl had done. Shame, for never noticing these things. Dodie had let her do them. Because she chose to be oblivious.   
Last night now seemed months away.   
These last eleven days were like years.   
Years that Dodie had failed to prevent.   
Years that Dodie couldn’t undo.   
Eleven days did not do justice for the things that had been going on.   
Dodie would make her pay for them, wanted to make sure they’d feel like years to her too. 

And now she was so close. Dodie, trained as a dancer, clearly much faster and fitter than Molly could be. Dodie would get her. Her fists already balled. Dodie could feel the skin on her knuckles tighten, ready. Loud thunder sounded through the grey sky. Dodie was only one step away from her. Then, suddenly. Multiple things happened at once.   
Dodie felt someone tug at her arm. Making her fall back. It was Bailey.  
Who ran faster than Dodie now.   
The rain abruptly stopped falling and Dodie became aware of how completely soaked she was.   
Molly ran through a rather large puddle and tripped and fell.  
But she hadn’t fallen.  
She went down because Bailey stood at the edge of the puddle.   
Raaf screamed in horror.  
Then Raaf caught with Dodie who, frozen by shock, hadn’t moved.  
Then everything in the world seemed to slow to a stop as Molly lay there.   
In front of them. At their feet. Bailey’s hands glowing. The tips of her heels just over the edge of the puddle. Molly lay there, face down in the rainwater. And the only sound Dodie heard, the fast beating of her own heart. The only thing Dodie felt, Raaf’s hands holding onto Dodie’s arm. All that Dodie could focus on was Molly’s still form far below Bailey’s towering form. Bailey’s balled up fists still shook with anger as the electric glow finally seeped from them and disappeared.   
Then Molly twitched. Moved and seemed to become aware of herself once more. She scrawled up on her feet quickly but trembling. Raaf’s hand tightened their grip on Dodie’s arm even more as both Dodie and Raaf exhaled loudly through their noses. Unsatisfied anger welling up anew. Bailey stepped forward, into the puddle. Making Molly scramble backwards in fright. 

“You...”

She began, weakly. Pointing a finger at the tall girl in front of her. Molly shook her head, confused, tried to compose herself as she stood up right. 

“I will report you, you – “

But Bailey cut her off right away. 

“Don’t… Ever…”

Wham! Bailey’s fist collided with Molly’s check, sending the girl a step back. 

“… come near Raaf ever again.”

Bailey continued. Staring the girl down as she went on.

“Don’t contact her, don’t talk to nor about her. Don’t even think about being anywhere near her. Never again!”

The seething, blind rage in Bailey’s voice was terrifying.

Molly nodded, stared at Bailey with scared eyes. Bailey raised her hand once more. But before she could do anything Molly turned around and fled the scene. Molly ran faster than she had ever ran before. 

The three girls watched her go until she was truly out of sight. And rain began to fall once more. 

“Bailey!”

Dodie called her over, her voice wild with shock. Raaf finally let go of Dodie’s arm, could support herself once more and wiped her face clear from tears and raindrops.

“Bailey what did you do…”

“What you were about to do.”

Bailey replied simply. But just as out of breath. 

“You were gonna beat the shit out of her, on campus ground? Getting yourself kicked out? Dodie, you can’t do that to yourself.”

“I thought… I thought you had shocked her to death. Bailey. All like cardiac arrest shock.”

“Well… I mean… luckily I didn’t.”

“Yeah.”

Raaf turned to both girls. Pulled the both of them closer.  
“I think Bailey saved both of us from trouble today, Dodie.”

Raaf added, that confident trait gaining notice in her body language once more. Dodie hesitantly looked from Raaf to Bailey. She realised what Raaf meant. What would have happened it Bailey didn’t attack Molly first. But Dodie wasn’t sure what this meant, for them. She couldn’t figure out how to react to Raaf’s intended comment. Raaf did for her however. Said the words Dodie would not want to say. 

“Bailey, you’re my hero.”

Raaf spoke in a raspy voice. A big smile on her unnaturally pale face.

And before Dodie could protest they were all hugging each other in a bone crushing embrace. Dodie felt Raaf’s arms, warm and strong, pulling Dodie close and holding Bailey tight. Dodie felt Bailey’s warm breath on her ear as she nuzzled in close and saw her grip Raaf even tighter. So, Dodie hugged both girls as hard as she could. Gave them both as much love and comfort as they did. Enjoying the warmth and calm before she eventually pulled back. 

“Are you alright, Raaf?”

“I am. I am now. Thanks, Swan.”

The raven-haired girl replied exhaustedly. A small smile still lingering on her lips. 

“We’re alright.”

“We are.”

Bailey breathed in agreement. And Raaf rubbed at her, still watering, golden eyes once more before admitting she just wanted to go home right now. And all three of them did. This day had been eventful enough. Tomorrow Raaf would give Mr. Dean her answer. She’d stay. Get her degree. And Raaf promised Dodie to visit the campus assigned trust person at least once to make sure she could talk about her feelings with someone. For those eleven days with Molly and however many she’d went through before them. Because Raaf made Bailey and Dodie promise to never bring her name up again. And Raaf wanted things to be normal again in the nest come morning. Wanted to pick up where they had left off. Just the three of them. And Raaf went to bed alone that night. Which was fine. Because Dodie and Bailey belonged together in their bed now. And if Raaf raised her eyebrow in surprise once to often when Bailey and Dodie told her what she’d missed those past eleven days, then Dodie would pretend it wasn’t because of the amount of things Dodie and Bailey had began doing together. It was just a growing bond in friendship anyway. And Raaf didn’t pick the newspaper up the next morning, let Bailey and Dodie have it. As they cuddled up on the couch. And Raaf just smiled and truly did enjoy how tight all three of them became. Especially now. Even if Dodie caught herself checking the whereabouts of her best friend a little more often than she would before. And Bailey showed Raaf the progress she’d made in Raaf’s collage folders and Raaf appreciated her work so much that the two bought Bailey her very own folder. The Nest gradually filled up with the most incredible little works and colours. The kids in Dodie’s dance class learned how to dance on heels. And all was well. As graduation day came closer slowly. With each passing day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, hello there. 
> 
> Here we are, chapter 9 already!
> 
> If you were here yesterday, when I posted this chapter without the ending, then hello again.   
> I'll let you know that I am well, that my friends came and gave me the support I needed today.   
> If you have no idea what I'm talking about, let's just say that I've had a weird few days and that I learned that you sometimes need to put yourself before others. And today I learned that that's allowed. And that friends will always be there for you to vent at the human race together. Also, you missed my shameless plug for my insta account (@denisevanwijk)
> 
> I know that as of right now, no one is reading my story. Unless you're all reading it without giving any sign of interaction, which is rude.   
> But I am massively enjoying the writing process of this story. I really do not like superhero au's but I really do like these character. I know this story has many flaws, but that's the point, I'm working through them and learning to bend. And as always, your feedback is like gold to me. 
> 
> So, here you go. The entirety of chapter 9 is up and ready to be read. 
> 
> \--   
> Next time on ACFAS: Graduation!   
> (we're coming to a close with the time jumps so shit will be more and more logical with each chapter, ain't that nice?)   
> __


	10. Polaroid Memories

20th of June – now

“Raaf, why are you doing that?”

Dodie asked her best friend, perplexed yet, amused. 

Raaf stood on the very tips of her toes, for no fucking reason. Well, the thing was, she was filling in a shopping list that Bailey had previously stuck on their fridge. And Bailey had stuck it there at her height. Her eye level. Which really wasn’t Raaf’s level. But she could’ve pulled the note down to her, instead of struggling to see what it was she was writing up there like she did now, on tiptoes. It irritated Dodie, who stared at the raven-haired girl from where she stood. Upside down. Her hands on her feet. Stretching her legs. 

So, Dodie asked her, with a sigh, why she was doing that. Almost falling herself and pretending that she didn’t. 

“Doing what?”

“That! …Like that.”

As Dodie spoke she moved her hands from one foot to the other. The lighter and a set of keys falling out of the pouch of her dungarees and tumbling onto the carpet.

“Why are you doing that?”

Raaf threw back with a chuckle as she finished writing her additions on their shopping list and she spun around to look at Dodie, on her tip toes still. Dodie blew a strand of hair out of her face and moved to her other foot, ignoring Raaf. Bailey walked into Dodie’s upside-down view and sat down in front of her. Picking up her things with a big smile on her face. 

“You both go absolutely nuts when you’re nervous, don’t you?”

“Nah. Not at all!”

Raaf laughed as she sat down next to Bailey. Dodie plopped herself onto the floor as well. 

“Whatever, I can’t help it. It’s a big day today.” 

“True.”

Raaf agreed, raising her fist in the air dramatically as Bailey interjected. 

“Yeah, but, Dodie, are you seriously gonna graduate in those dungarees?”

“Raaf’s wearing pants too!”

“Raaf’s wearing a pantsuit dear.”

“Well, it doesn’t matter, I’ll be wearing one of those awesome cloaks all day anyway. And I like to have pockets, so, no thanks to the dress.”

“And I’ll drink to that.”

“Not yet! Please girl, hold it ‘till the end.”

-  
The three girls left the comfort of the Nest a few minutes later. Riding their bikes to the college grounds. Bailey holding onto Dodie, sitting on her cargo rack having promised not to make her hair go all static. It was a beautiful, sunny day, the soft wind pushed them along the road.  
Once their bikes were locked, and the keys had been safely stored in Bailey’s canvas tote bag, the three girls hugged each other tightly. Bailey wishing them luck before she left to join the growing crowd of friends and family members that were led through the doors to the auditorium. The audience of the graduates. Raaf’s parents should already be inside. Claiming the best front row seats to see their daughter graduate, finally. And they probably planned to set an unbreakable record for the biggest supporters on the island. Even if they’d have to slap some teachers out of their folding chairs with handmade signs and party blowers. To Dodie, Mr. and Mrs. Frott were the loveliest people. So proud of both Raaf and Dodie. Dodie wouldn’t blink an eye if they truly did show up with a huge ‘Go Girls Go!’ sign admits the ceremony. Dodie loved Raaf’s parents. Loved how they’d call her for updates on their daughter whenever Raaf neglected to call them again. And she tried not to feel too fuzzy whenever Mrs. Frott would ask Dodie the same questions she had for Raaf. Dodie told herself it was just a polite thing. That it was just common decency for them to be just as interested in Dodie’s life. But she still did tell them her own stories just the same. Appreciated the warmth their voices held for her too. They were lovely people. And Dodie helped Raaf put her cap on and fix her short hair in a cute, but still cool, bop. Raaf helped Dodie just the same. Checking each other’s style and outfit, smoothing out every last crinkle nervously. 

“I can’t believe this…”

Raaf spoke softly. As she pulled at her clothes repetitively before opting to walk in circles around her. 

“I can’t believe it, Dot. I – I can’t believe we did it.”

“We did.”

“I’m a graduate now, Swan. I have my papers, my degree.”

“You do.”

Dodie replied softly, looking into Raaf’s unbelieving, overwhelmed eyes. Raaf had had to fight so hard to get here. To get to this day. Raaf had given everything.  
Dodie stopped Raaf’s pandering and smoothed out her robe. 

“You deserve this Raaf. You deserve this so much!”

This would be Raaf’s day. Dodie knew this much. As she hugged her best friend tightly and kissed her on her forehead. 

“I am so proud of you.”

Dodie told Raaf sincerely. Tickling her in her side as she saw her golden eyes well up. 

“Come on, Frott. Let’s go. Let’s get this thing over with.”

Raaf smiled again. 

They both left the classroom-turned-into-changing-room and joined the other nervous students backstage. Raaf reached for Dodie’s hand. Pulled her close to her. 

“This is ours, Swan. We made it and no one can take this away from us.”

“No one.”

Dodie agreed, she held onto Raaf’s hand, squeezed it supportively. Waiting for their turn to join their own classes on the stage. 

There weren’t that many classes in total. Yet the wait was nerve wrecking for the girls. From where they stood, behind the ajar door leading onto the podium, they could get a peek into the old-fashioned auditorium. It’s wooden walls and high ceiling. And every single chair filled up by supportive and proud loved ones. One by one the teachers would call out a name, ushering a student up on stage and letting them enjoy the applause as their age and subjects would be read out loud. Then they’d receive their degree, sign their papers, shake a hand and leave the stage. They’d be done. Graduated. Ready to go and never look back. A banner that hung above the signing table spelled the campus name and current year in sparkling purple calligraphy. 

Before they knew It Raaf’s name was called. 

“Raaf Frott.” 

And Raaf’s hand left Dodie’s as she was pushed onto the podium. She looked so elegant, even though Dodie could see her knees shake from where she stood, behind the door. 

“Raaf Frott, 23 years, degree in visual arts and specialized in propaganda within politics and collages within practical examinations for the arts.” 

Dodie stared at Raaf’s back through the open door and watched her do a curtsy before accepting her papers and moving the tassel on her cap from the right to the left. Dodie tried her very hardest not to cry and ruin her mascara. 

Raaf then left the stage, gown flowing after her gracefully. She joined Bailey and her parents in the audience instead of leaving the room. And then it was just Dodie. Only a few more minutes left in this place. So much had happened in those four years. It was insane. Even just in those last six months. 

It took a while for Dodie’s class to be called out after all the art students. But when Daya Picollo left the stage and Dodie Pointer’s name was called she trotted onto the steps up to the stage. Proud and big. She waved at Bailey giddily. Then accepted her degree. Signed her name. Shook some hands and cried a little. As she walked over to the exit of the stage, passing Miss Fish and her list of names and her microphone… Dodie suddenly had an idea. And she acted on impulse. Dodie grabbed her teacher by her hands and hugged her, thanking her. Then she stole her microphone as she held her degree up in the air. 

“This one’s for you Raaf! We did it. We fucking made it.”

The whole room fell into an awkward silence. But the Frott family and Bailey jumped up, gave Dodie a standing ovation, clapped and cheered and Followed Dodie, running out of the auditorium as quickly as they could. 

“You cursed in front of all of the head of uni!”

Raaf screamed. Out of breath as they ran all the way back to their bikes. 

“Yeah, I did.”

“But, you know what? It doesn’t matter…”

Raaf began with a grin, finally stopping at their bikes, the others catching up to them. Catching their breath as Dodie finished Raaf’s sentence for her. 

“’Cause we mother-fucking graduated!”

Both girls yelled at the same time as they began to jump around in delight. Bailey and Mr. and Mrs. Frott watched the girls in surprise and laughing at their victory dance. 

But Dodie just grabbed Bailey by her shoulders and spun her towards her. 

“Pup.”

She exclaimed happily. Looking at the beautiful joy that composed Bailey’s face. And she kissed her. Kissed Bailey. Full on her moth. Dodie pulled her tight and kissed her hard. 

Right in front of everyone. Their bikes awkwardly at their sides. And Bailey gulped in shock but kissed her back just as hard. Really more a clash of luck and lust than love. Yet love was what seemed to bloom. And they stumbled to stay upright without breaking apart. Without losing each other’s touch. Kissing. Pure and sweet and happy. Short. 

Too soon Dodie pulled back. Cheeks heated for what she’d just done. Bailey was out of breath. And Raaf had completely stopped moving. Staring at the two girls with her mouth wide open. 

“Wow. Uhmm…”

Raaf sputtered awkwardly. Dodie laughed awkwardly, moving her hands over her own lips to remove any stray lipstick as if to disguise what she had just done. Yet Raaf grabbed both girls and hugged them massively tightly.

“I knew it. I knew it! Fuck yeah, I knew it.”

She sighed happily, cursing in German under her breath. Then she hit Dodie on her arm. Quite hard too. 

“You didn’t even tell me you ass!”

“Well there wasn’t… I was- “

“-I’m so happy for you two. No, this is perfect! I want to organize the wedding. I’m calling dips on the decorations and the planning!”

“Raaf!"

A now bright red Dodie protested as Raaf swooned on. 

“Don’t you dare get married without me.”

“Alright, alright. I won’t.”

Dodie laughed as Bailey slowly seemed to come back down from the shock of the kiss and grabbed Dodie by her face, palms to her cheeks. A fierce look in her green eyes as she kissed Dodie back even harder. 

Somewhere in the back of the corner of Dodie’s eyes she saw Raaf’s parents say their goodbyes as they left the three friends to celebrate their graduation in their own way. 

Once Dodie and Bailey finally broke apart Mr. and Mrs. Frott had already gone. The two of them were left red-cheeked and chuckling under Raaf’s amused look. Happiness blossomed all around them. 

“You two done, or what?”

Raaf spoke, being the first to propose their next move.

“I think this time we truly deserve a night out. Without a guilty conscience. We’ve worked hard enough those past four years. And I’ve got something to celebrate with the both of you babes.”

Raaf said confidently, wiggling her eyebrows playfully. Looking at the girls gleefully. 

The voice of an old man speaking out from across the college ground interrupted them however and demanded their attention. 

“Dodie? Wait there!”

Raaf and Bailey turned around, confused at who was calling out for her. What for. For Dodie, however, there was no mistake in to whom that voice belonged to. She could feel her cheeks heat up as she attempted to shy away behind the backs of her best friends. Grabbing Bailey’s hand tightly. Tugging at Raaf’s shoulder as she whispered in her ear. 

“Come on, Raaf. Let’s go. Please.”

Raaf still watched the man as he approached them. Then a hint of recognition and understanding and a little bit of passable racism struck her face. 

“No. Dodie, is that him?”

Dodie felt sick and couldn’t speak. So, she just nodded slightly. Her cheek rubbing against Raaf’s arm. 

“We’re not running away, Swan. You can do this. Let’s just give him a chance to speak to you.”

Bailey turned to Dodie, her eyes big in surprise. 

“Is that-?” 

Dodie nodded once more. Raaf stepped forward, temporarily giving away Dodie’s hiding place to the man. Dodie let go of Bailey’s hand. Raaf walked forward, meeting him in the middle, standing in front of Dodie once more. 

“You must be Mr. Pointer, I assume?”

She asked politely, shaking his hand as she introduced herself ‘Raaf Frott, Dodie’s best friend.’ And Mr. Pointer tried to step around her to get to Dodie. 

“Excuse me Raaf, pleasure to meet you, I’d like to speak to my daughter now.”

Dodie’s stomach dropped. And as Raaf reluctantly did step aside Dodie came eye to eye with her father for the first time in years. 

-

It was a bizarre feeling for Dodie, standing there. Meeting her father anew, since the day he kicked her out. To have to shake his outstretched hand as a greeting while feeling all the colour drain from her face. 

Thinking back to it later, Dodie wouldn’t be able to remember how it happened. She knew the gist of it, knew what was said. It just felt like someone else’s story she vaguely knew bits about. Not her own memory of only a few hours ago. All she would remember was the things she’d said as they’d roll over again and again in her mind as the three girls stumbled homewards from the pub. Yet it probably wasn’t the alcohol that had made her forget. 

Her father had stood there, in front of her, staring at her, just looking, for a while. A while that felt like a forever. And Dodie, for the life of her, did not know what to do. How to stand, how to look, what to say, how to feel. 

The promise of a stupid dance out at some bar seemed a sweeter escape than ever before. 

Then Dodie’s father spoke. Still the distance. Still the look. Still the uncomfortable memories of painful pasts. As Dodie’s father spoke.

“You’re not a ballerina then?”

“W- what?”

“I, eh, I attended the ceremony. The graduation. You… have a degree in – “

“Advertisement, specialities in program development and online media.”

“Yes, exactly.”

“But I do still dance! I never stopped, dad! I even teach dance classes now– “

She’d called her dad dad. 

“It’s ok- it’s ok!”

Mr. Pointer already interrupted her.

“I’m proud of you. It doesn’t matter what you chose to study, what you choose as job. As long as you’re comfortable. And happy. That matters to me.”

“Oh, right. Of course.”

Because that was obvious. And why did Dodie ever think she would have to hide and pretend she was an ambitious, pretentious dancer. Whose pride was she tending to?

“How did you – why did you come here?”

“Because you’re my daughter and I want to see my oldest graduate.”

Dodie felt the sick feeling reappear in her stomach by the mention of her siblings. She missed them so much. Did they miss her, remember her at all?

“I- …. I-“

Dodie felt her body tremble. It felt like she’d missed a part of their conversation. As she thought back to it now. Like not everything had been said, had been forgiven. Dodie remembered how Bailey reached out for her hand but how she had pulled away, again. Which was a stupid, hurtful move. Another thing to regret. 

“And because I’ve forgiven you. The school’s kept me up to date on your progress. I know you’ve had therapy. Dodie, I’m so glad that you got better.”

Silence was all Dodie’s mind could response with. 

“And I thought, maybe, it was time you came back. Help your sisters out a little…”

Dodie’s breath hitched. 

“She didn’t just decide to get better.”

Raaf spoke, suddenly stepping in, her face like a thunderstorm. Looking intensely at Mr. Pointer. Giving Dodie the breath she needed. Because this was so confusing. Her dad was here. And her Dad didn’t hate her?

“I know, I know.”

He said to Raaf, he appeared so calm and sure. Raaf wasn’t calm at all. 

“Look, you can’t just come back when everything’s said and done.”

“Raaf!”

“I didn’t mean to drop you like that Dodie, of course I ne-“

“You kicked her out!”

“I ran away, Raaf.”

Dodie came between them. 

“You weren’t safe.”

Raaf reminded her. 

“They weren’t safe!”

Dodie exclaimed. 

“You should’ve helped her!”

Raaf pleaded, effectively shifting the blame back to Mr. Pointer. 

“You weren’t there, you don’t know what it was like.”

Dodie tried, weakly. Not sure what side to defend anymore. 

“If I was, I would’ve helped you. Like family should, Dot… Like we do.”

The three raised their voices, apologies, accusations and arguments. And they all blurred together as Raaf pulled Dodie from the dancefloor to the bar. 

Dodie remembered her father’s desperate look with each shot she drank. How taken aback they both were by Raaf’s point of view. Dodie trusted Raaf’s opinion. She just didn’t understand it. Even if it was the truth. She knew Raaf was family too now. And she watched Raaf lean over the bar to kiss the bartender over the taps. 

Then, once Raaf found Dodie outside the club, having a smoke, she looked at her with worry in her eyes. It took a while for Dodie’s mind to catch up to the words that Raaf was saying as the girl took the cigarette from her. 

“You ok there?”

“I’m just, I’m going over what happened, my dad.”

“I know, but I don’t want you to think about that right now.”

“I know. It’s just… I don’t know how to feel about it. I did apologize right? Like – I know, Raaf! – I know how you feel about it. – But please…. I did apologize for what I did to them, did I not?”

“You did. Sincerely and with a lot of words. Multiple times in a row. It’s impossible for him to have missed it.”

Raaf said with a sigh. Throwing the cigarette onto the pavement and leaning on the wall. 

“Good.” 

“Yeah.”

And Dodie remembered her father asking her to come back into their lives. The open invitation. 

“My number hasn’t changed, we still live in the same house, our door is always open. Please come see us. Take your time, I will understand. But give us a call at least. We miss you.” 

He had said. 

“Don’t you give her this choice, don’t you dare put it on her now, you should’ve thought better and stayed away.”

Raaf fought, before stepping down at last, because this was still Dodie’s father, which meant Dodie couldn’t just close a door and be done with this.

And then the acceptance came. As three girls watched the estranged man walk away from them in defeat. Walk off the campus ground that he did not belong on. And neither did they. Not anymore. 

Dodie took a sip of the glass of whatever that Raaf had brought outside with her. She downed half of it as she remembered thinking about at least maybe calling sometime soon. And her dad would still have the same phone number. And then, before he left, before Raaf got to upset and Dodie forgot to be present in her own reality, she remembered how she had taken a step back as he had stepped forward. How he had sighed before nodding at Bailey. He had stared right at her and told her he was glad to meet her too. To which Bailey had nodded politely, averting Dodie’s gaze immediately. Her father had seen them kiss, still wasn’t angry at Dodie. That still was an unbelievable thought to Dodie. But maybe she should not think about kissing Bailey or anyone at all while this drunk. 

“He didn’t mind me kissing a girl.”

Dodie somehow still blabbed out loud. 

Raaf just laughed at that. 

Then something more tangible sprung back to life in Dodie’s memories. 

“Holy shit!”

“What happened?”

Raaf asked, confused, checking her surroundings.”

“You kissed a boy.”

Now Raaf’s face warmed to a red colour. And it wasn’t from the cold outside. 

“Well, yeah. I wanted you to meet him.”

“Him.”

Raaf’s blush worsened. 

“I know. I guess I do like boys too. I guess I’m bi. Do you mind?”

“It’s fine babe. It really is. It’s not like you’re ditching me in this queerness. Bi is still queer as fuck, right?”

“Yeah.”

Raaf agreed. 

“We’re still disgusting abominations then.”

“Together.”

And maybe Raaf and Dodie shared a joint Raaf found in her wallet over this new celebration. But they graduated. No one could stop them. They were grown woman. And maybe they went for one more shot at the bar, giggling childishly at Spike the barman, as they pulled an unknowing Bailey along with them. 

“Is he good for you?”

“He is Dodie, I think he really is.”

Dodie watched him smile at her a while longer, smile at Raaf like Molly never had and like Raaf deserved to be smiled at. Dodie thought he must be. 

And as they found their way home Raaf would gush over how much she liked the bartender. How she met him and if she was maybe actually dating him now. And in the morning neither girls would remember a thing from their walk home onwards because there was still some wine left in the kitchen that even Bailey was too wasted to hide from them. But that was fine because that just meant they’d get to talk about Raaf’s butterfly feelings all over again come morning. And Dodie would savour those moments forever. Because now, even if the polaroids with scribbled taglines faded and the thoughts were tainted by her past and him coming back, even still, there was so much fun and love and new beginnings and Bailey’s kiss and Raaf’s boyfriend and Mrs. Frott cheering them both on and a sweet girl with big green eyes hugging her so tightly as they lay in bed. Surrounded by the cold square pictures that Dodie had dug out of Bailey’s shoebox that had spilled over easily within weeks. And the smile Bailey gave Dodie as she looked up contently was one of these memories worth saving forever. Golden and magical. And there for Dodie’s memories, to watch again on less golden days. Bailey was her hero just by holding her and smiling like that. For giving her what she’d normally give in return tonight. And for giving her a new story as her own, as she had feared, had closed today. Dodie didn’t really know what that meant, and if this meant they were making a new story together now. Or what that meant. But as sleep took Dodie and her eyes closed, this memory would be there, undefeatable. Even though clouded, still golden.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hey, it's me, it turns out I kind of didn't survive Christmas after all.  
> Yet I seem to be alive and well. 20gayteen has been kind. 
> 
> Ok here's what you missed: I got a new job, thank fuck.  
> I am preparing for my exams.  
> I finished my last internship and finished the whole year with an excellent. Yes, thank you very much.  
> I wrote, produced and directed a short movie with my friend. Just the two of us. It's enrolled for an award. And we have five more days to finish post-production. (We've been working on it for 11 days and are halfway through.) I just seem to love stress, don't I? (I don't) 
> 
> I'm sorry for this long ass wait. I've had this chapter ready to go since January but didn't want to post it without knowing I'd have the next chapter ready by the end of the following month. Which still isn't true. But I just couldn't not keep ACFAS alive. It's my baby and my muse. I need this story, it motivates me to pull through like nothing else. 
> 
> April's quite a long and crazy month. Who knows what May will bring. 
> 
> \--  
> Next time on ACFAS: December came, and December does what it does best to Bailey.  
> (yes, this chapter was supposed to go up five months ago, you know, in December. But that's what I get for being a filmmaker, writer, student and bartender at the same time.)  
> __


End file.
